Heaven

2006-06-11T21:45:00.000+08:00

[小桥流水花恋蝶风轻轻地吹
往事莫追你了解我等的是谁
梅雨时节飘落叶等满满的水位
全身而退我不会我等时间惭愧]

南拳妈妈 - 花蝶恋

beautiful lyrics, beautiful song..

一时的失落能使人坠落谷底

人与动物不同之处尽是如此

但只要能找到安抚人心的事

一时的失落也能被化作力量..

在一个介绍南拳妈妈新专辑网页看见了这段文字：

方文山绝妙韵美的词，将“蝶恋花”这个词牌名对倒成“花恋蝶”，成了另一种爱情里的角色互换的趣味。(sounds super c lit ah) but 重点是 --〉其实大多数人在爱情里扮演的，不是那流连花丛的蝶，而是痴痴等候的花。。。感触良深，吃饱没事做的不防思考一番喔。

以下本来应该是花恋蝶的歌词，但不知从哪里来的更美的一段：

婉转的他不懂说话

窈窕的她从来无话

蝶恋花翩翩飞舞未归家

每晚每天仍期待身边解语花

花偏爱假装哑巴

每晚每天仍期望他肯先说话

盼蝶儿不要害怕

暖暖春天匆匆去罢

转眼之间长长炎夏

蝶恋花偏偏只会围绕她

每晚每天仍期待身边解语花

花不爱假装哑巴

每晚每天仍期望他敢先说话

盼蝶儿不再害怕

片片秋枫飘飘降下

冷冷秋意明媚如画

蝶恋花终殉爱伴飞花

每晚每天曾期待身边解语花

花偏爱假装哑巴

每晚每天仍期望他肯先说话

盼蝶儿不要害怕

每晚每天曾期待身边解语花

花不爱假装哑巴

每晚每天会期望他敢先说话

盼蝶儿不再害怕

美吧！不知是否是真正的《蝶恋花》。。。

虽然没写作的天分但至少爱欣赏吧~

2006-06-11T20:54:00.000+08:00

初恋粉色系

~~~~~~~~

钟声敲醒萌芽的爱情　
微风透露春来的讯息
我成天躲在被窝
幻想和你手牵手

天空不禁飘起了小雨　
校门口没有人来接你
如果你允许　能否让我
帮你撑伞陪你走

彩虹射穿太阳雨(射穿太阳雨)
像爱情穿梭四季（穿梭了四季）
蓝天赶走了乌云　
教室里偷吻了你

初恋的粉色系　脸颊旁的唇蜜　
透露爱情来临的小秘密
催眠般的魔力　陷入你的陷阱　
抽钥匙希望能够载到你
初恋的粉色系　任性的大眼睛　
像棉花糖般佻皮又淘气
没有云好天气　像恋爱的心情　
骑我的bubu载著你　搭乘甜蜜

低腰裤　搭上淡蓝眼影　

训导主任都被你吸引

没痊愈的草莓印　

躲在围巾里喘息

挂在班牌上的棒球帽　　

是下课想约你的暗号

手机没讯号　也能收到　

放学一起吃汉堡

心型圈

~~~~~
我送上初恋在你的面前
再将我爱你温习一遍
我无法首演对你的思念
若爱有风险我宁愿中箭

那一年春天爱发芽蔓延

我们故事颜色鲜艳

我将爱完全花在你身边

对爱纠缠很明显想腻在你的房间

触电的瞬间同一边肩并着肩黏你脸靠着脸
看着照片许愿傻笑了好几遍画十字在胸前
闭眼祈祷梦会实现

呵气在玻璃上面画心型的圈
雾渐渐不见你终于出现
听不进劝对爱死心眼
希望这趟爱情走很远
我用我指尖画心型的圈
然后碎碎念想像你听见
空出时间默背你的脸
认真翻字典查我们的永远

偏见

~~~
我手心的温度渐渐在离开
你口中的谎言慢慢能明白
早知求也求不回来即使最后只剩残骸
心不会更改没有祝福我明白

看凋零的玫瑰在静静发呆
朋友对我责怪要我放得开
固执对我是种虐待越爱得深越难抛开
爱是种偏见如果可以再重来

我明白爱情已经超载
爱的完全坏了姿态
你冷眼看待就像是种伤害
我好像站在无人山崖
全世界都抛在外
明知你不再回来我早已明白

假装

~~~

呼吸着一种孤独的味道

心跳在你沉默以后慢慢的被淡忘掉

我笑了笑反正你看不到

我要的幸福遗落在你怀抱

当爱失了焦那些最初的美好早被你搁在一角

街上拥挤人潮走着看着都是摧眠符号

记忆停不了穿过读你的心跳

穿过想你的味道我只想不被打扰

假装多好我只要只想要再拥有一秒
去相信你的拥抱一直会让我依靠
继续等待还心甘情愿的不想逃

假装多好依然是依然是暧昧的 tone调
一个人无理取闹两人世界的煎熬
我被自己困在自己设下的圈套

像是驼鸟相信时间是唯一解药
视而不见傻到了无可救药
其实早明了你的爱已随风飘
想要找再也找不到

假装多好我只要只想要再拥有一秒

去相信你的拥抱还心甘情愿的不想逃

假装多好依然是依然是暧昧的同调

一个人无理取闹两人世界的煎熬

我被自己困在自己设下的圈套

假装自己已解开冰冷的手铐

2006-06-11T17:05:00.000+08:00

haiz.. haf been busy n lazy to update.. almost wanna kill tis blog le.. anw, like nobody reads .. haha coz i nvr blog? nar, the cycle continues.. watever.. but whenever i c smt i sldnt c, i cant help but to feel liek blogging.. haiz.. human beings always liek to find things out of nothing.. ur life can actually be very happy n sweet, but u choose to think too much n see too much. internet is somehow bad.. but it isnt good to remain ignorant either.. it's some sort liek cheating urself in another way.. now i dunno if it's good to noe too much.. ur mind tend to wander far away, wif ur own imagination.. if u dunno much, u live wif ur assumptions.. ur innerself tend to tell u not to find out more, but ur curious side betrayed u to know more abt things that can hurt u.. contradicting human beings. life is really liek a roller coaster, a minute ago u can be on clouds nine, a minute later u can juz easily sink to the bottom of the pit, n injured on the 1 min journey down.. the cycle juz continues.. well, maybe one sld juz learn to see open n accept the reality.. argh.. human species are juz so foolish.. well, maybe i sld juz be engrossed in work n keep my mind occupied huh, so the mind cant wander to lalala land.. but haiz my work is juz so slack.. hope the coming week can be beta n beta.. haiz.. motivation of the next 2 weeks is juz my cousin's "bday wedding chalet". . seems hard to come man haiz.. to think that some stupid motivation have kept me going for the past week omg..

music therapy...

2006-05-16T00:12:00.000+08:00

argh, thou it occassionally feels really good to have someone talking abt u in the blog, but not to the extent that, erm, anyhow assume things. no worries, i am not talking abt u, the person have no access to my blog i think =X opps like v bad? but hmmz, not everything is " she n me" lo. it's actually "she" only, or "all of us" lah.. alamak.. *faints* haiz duno wat to do..

mother's day is the busiest day of a daughter i guess. hard pleasing everyone, tired. haiz. but yah, i became main chef on the day.. haha my amazin cookin haha cant posted here leh, too bad haha. but i noe they are happily digested in my stomach alrdy. no crabs but the meal is okay lah huh? ha..

hard organizing stuff. everything seems to crash on the same day. 2oth is really such a great date huh? haiz.. i always land myself in messsessss.. have been looking much much forward to feel the sun but i dunno if it can come true in near future haiz. so many things coming up. wld really enjoy more of those impromtu ones i guess? haha *smiles* hmmz but yah, go when i feel like going, do when i feel liek doing. carefree is the word izzit? haiz watever.. 要做一个人。。很麻烦。 u need to consider all factors, n place urself last haiz.. *shake heads*

it's either too much sleeping or the feeling of lost that makes one moody argh..

2006-05-13T23:02:00.000+08:00

have been travelling everywhere on bus recently.. 157/174 to orchard n 106/99 back nowadays.. but it feels good to travel on bus (i do mean air con bus haha, double decked even beta). those long rides allow u to either stone totally, or think abt things u wldnt when u are busy doing ur stuffs. have got the bez time now to really enjoy rides, coz u need not worry abt wasting time not reading or doing anything constructive.. it really feels good.. but juz one thing i realised, i haven seen a single soul rnd those rich areas of bukit timah.. not inside the hse, nor at the car porch.. only cars n hse.. seems kinda dead huh? -_- hdb seems somehow beta haha no offence..

some of my hair dropped=( i duno how long it will take for it to grow back that length. but i cant let those wild grass grow n do nothing.. this cycle juz continues n maybe that's y my hair juz cant grow.. argh. those hairdressers muz be earning big bucks, 45 for juz liddat.. oh my god, if not for the vouchers, i wldnt go there.. i dun deny that they are good coz it is really nice, but it's only temporary, for like 3 hrs. coz after i wash my hair, it's back to square1.. the rest is up to me to handle alrdy argh. it's always liddat.. *argGh

n i finally haha, after so long, touched my vodka. have been walking pass it everyday when preparing for exams n during exam period. my mum have been saying "你那瓶还不要喝阿？" everyone else seems scared of the bottle dunno y.. haha so it's mine lo. yah, so there is some improvement now, the meniscus went down.. lolx..

had one of my happiest 2.30hr after so so long.. beaming from the bottom of my heart.. =) i really do cherish that (",)

2006-05-10T00:07:00.000+08:00

wah biang, i juz realised the lecturer of my intersem module is called Michael Tay.. win le lo, nvr call tis name wif tis sirname ma tsk tsk.. ponning lec tml haha. =P makes no much diff coz i slept my way thru for the past 2 days.. anw, juz had feast.. haha XO 螃蟹米粉 wif super big fish head that is super delicious, n some other dishes.. haven eat crab for a long long long long long long time.. yummy.... werid, cant eat prawn, can eat crab, can eat lobster. my mum claimed that prawn is more poisonous? haha..aiyah, more xpensive ones can eat la.. haha had a very fulling dinner, happie haha. the journey back is oso interesting. juz a slow walk of abt 10 mins, the feelin is juz great. i lov my family haha. had a super ambitious aim tis week, haha like cooking crab? lolx. if i really do, perhaps one might juz be crawling rnd the hse when we are sleeping. hope i wldnt set my hse on fire. =X sort of wanting to fly b4 i can walk huh? haha.. ambitious, ambitous. the thot of the menu, i am actually laugh at myself alrdy. we shall c how it goes. lolx.

well, me poor hamsters 分居 officially alrdy =( i dismantled the ladder so there is totally no chance for them to accidentally break the partition in the middle of the nit, squeaking till i jumped out of the bed in the middle of the nit.. i miss their squeaking, how they used to play wif one another, disturb one another, fight occassionally coz they are juz playful. no more now. think they have become foes officially. i thot they missed each other after separation for so long but i am wrong. very wrong. i let them meet, but upon meeting, they "merged" into 1 n became unseparable. i dont dare to put my hand to separate them coz i will be bitten. they dont even squeak liek they do in the past when fighting. 肥肥 no longer run away but is oso actively involved in fighting n biting the other. omg.. my dad 束手无策 too, wat we did that was successful in the past did not help either. luckily feifei jumped out soon. poor hamsters seriously injured in less than 3 mins. bloodshed. 案发现场有很明显的血迹. ='( 肥肥's mouth had bruises like he was juz being punched. one drop of blood dripped on the tissue paper that i left outside the cage. i feel liek bandaging 瘦瘦's arm, like those wif a bandage rnd his neck kind? haiz poor hamsters. it's v sad looking at how enemies they have became.. haiz. bathing session postponed again, have to wait for their injuries to held.. ='(

i dont long shopping suddenly but feel liek being under the sun instead. i want to go cycling n blading, haven been to ecp for long time man. my ecp kaki liek gone haiz. i want to watch sunset.. i want to exercise too, but i haven think of wat to do yet. haha is this another moment if impulse? not for the time being i think ha. i want to c the dentist, but it juz happened to be closed on that day i went. *piew. i have got a lot of rubbishie things to do, like selling the stupid econs textbook that i nvr use n the a levels GP tys. argh. n my yang qin, haiz.. i need a car to send it back to shang yi n say byebye by selling it at a loss. i need to find a place rnd the computer to fix the scanner which has been lying in the box for a long time. i dunno wat books n papers i sld throw away to make space for new ones. i need to revamp the rooms n the hse. argh.

2006-05-08T12:23:00.000+08:00

haha happie day today, no is yesterday but sama sama coz the happiness is flowed till today lolx!! by right sld be meeting 2 pple n almost travelling half of spore, but ended up nvr meet. but heng, no need to travel till vomit. went shopping, really shopping. well, 1st time in my life i bought so much stuff but so cheap haha. really is qio dio alrdy muhahhaa.. so satisfied wif my 战胜品 haha... shant elaborate more haha look at photo can alrdy lol.

"da-dang-da-dang".............:

BUT PHOTO CANT COME OUT!! argh.. i shall try again.. but i really got super great deal haha. according to wat i have learnt today, the above item have fulfilled my expectation of quality, purpose, price, function etc etc haha. i can throw away those canteenchair/swimming/shopping etc etc free bags hehe.. 好bag难寻, really. well, i bring hill out esp to sch like 小叮当can? so muz find one as gd as his pocket ma haha!! BUT my super happie day is spoilted by the stupid details of my stupid elective stupid me choose to take. i am going to SU it man argh. case study 20%, project 60%, presentation 20%. super sian diao yest nit, but after attendin my 1st lesson today, wah not so bad BA?? dunno leh haha. 10 person in a project team, hope i wldn be the few suay ones to present ba? any sensible person wldnt be so stupid to get lousy me to present rit?? haha. i forgot wat i wanted to say, coz fang disrupted me lolx. i am at her hse now, setting off to partyworld to muahhaha SING wif belly lolx!!! haha only 1 thing to say: feels liek home wif them =) haha.

2006-05-05T02:04:00.000+08:00

helllo everybody!! wahaa i am back lolx!! means exams over lo!! haha... well we shall not mention abt that now.. haiz can write a heap regarding that 5 lettered word, but not now, when i got the mood.. haha holiday ahead, finally.. but i taking intersem module, starting on next week omg.. but nvm, it's only monday to wed, 9-12.. juz take it as i cant sleep till 12pm for 3 days a week lo whahhaa. the day is still young at 12noon man haha. so peepz, we can still go out, no worries! juz no k-lunching on mon-wed la haha.. n perhaps, i might have some difficulty finding jobz ba? nvm we c how it goes.. nothing toubles now haha. so any pt jobs anyone?!? intro k ahaha. talking abt jobz:

for once i saw a super nice temp job which i like so super much, totally suitable i think, n love at first sight. smt like PARTTIME assistant in bakery or customer service at where u guess?!? no experience needed n the requirement is: MUST LOVE DOGS!!!! omg... it's the perfect one, part time, then love dogs, means working at some cafe for dogs n owners lah!!! but the only prob is.... it's at...SENGKANG!!!!!!!!!!! please stop me from having the urge to go for interview n create a potential possibility of travelling 1.5x2 hrs everyday yeah.. haiz but i like the job... ='( boohooo~

well, juz starting my super slow friendster surfing n stopped at a friend's. jealous, super jealous of him.. learning wat he likes.. haiz.. it really takes a lot of effort to really commit to smt that is x n difficult but wat u noe u really like.. jealous, envious... i oso want to learn, but i dun wish to make spoil n rust their x n class n super chio set at the sch lo.. haiz.. maybe i will juz take piano as substitute 1st, at least piano wldnt rust rit? somemore i got one rotting at home rit? haiz but well.. trying to convince myself that it's a stepping stone to wat i wish.. actually piano oso not bad huh, like my laogong rit? ha or maybe by the time i piano grade4 or more, i wld've recovered much more n ready for wat i want? haha think too much, piano grade4...lolx. xpensive leh.. where on earth am i going to find $$$? i got so many things i want to do n more urgent ones to do wif the little $$$ i have tsk tsk. but i reallu hope to get something going tis holiday.. u think i can? haha we shall c 3 mths later lo lolx... haiz 3 mths, so many things can be done n so many things can happen.. well, if only if only.. if only i cld be granted one wish..
if only u cld be granted one wish, wat wld it be neh..?

2006-03-18T11:05:00.000+08:00

muhahaha mingyong is super happie at tis point of typing lolx. hehe finally went to sing yest nit, after so long.. craving is v well satisfied lolx. actually is the process that is more memorable. thou had a hard time organizing coz everyone is bz, everyone actually turned up. all 6 of us wif my cousin's bf haha. 7 of us. 4 hrs at party world ain enuff. my cousin n junior to be is super funny. practially left me wif no image yest, coz laugh till my head almost went off. super funny hha.. he can really make us laugh n gao xiao lah, juz like his dad i think. very comfortable wif everyone there sooo gooda. heez. but party world no good ah, the counter really counting down til 4 hrs, no is 3 hrs 55 mins. argh. but nvm the lucky thing is they charged us for for person lolx. =x hehe talked at coffee bean at 11 plus. chatted abt a lot of things. well, it's really nice to be able to get together after so long. long time since we were young haha.. thanks everyone for being present n make me feel so happie n relaxed man haha.. it has been quite some time since i went out to enjoy myself, exams coming up n the stupid op really make me sian dao dunno how to say. argh. nvm after the op week, i can reward myself wif another k session muahahha.. free somemore lolx. but next week weall feel liek watching zhang shao han leh hehe. so many things to distract me argh. haiz but meanwhile, i realy really have to shou shui xin qing, speak more english n prepare my mugging mood argh*. wish me luck.

2006-03-03T23:15:00.000+08:00

was traumatised by a road accident yest.was walking wif my dad n suddenly there was one boom sound, dunno how to describe. n there, the person is lying there. face flat on the road. scary.... very scary.. luckily we walked inner to the block n not juz along the road, if not i think the impact on me wld be much greater.. =X

anw, after preparing n attemping my 1st chem associated ca after 1 yr, i can really conclude that i got gwee phobia.. so scary.. looking at those notes really made me think of how he used to say "how come u dunnno.. so ez u dunno.." haha the sacary moment in the class room.. when u thot everyone in the class noes except u.. but apparently not.. lolx.. oh well, my phobia of not doing well for chem.. it's juz there... sianz.. from the past till now, always think i dunno n scared of chem.. but now that i have landed myself in such a STUPID mess here, feeling so geked when i think abt it, i can only TRy to pick myself up n move on to only succeed n not fail.. so i muz prevent myself from having such blankout mind, thinking that i dunno watever so ez stuff that i sld noe b4 CHEMISTRY test n ca etc. it's real scaryy..but it's really amazing how a 15 min 10 mcq ca can have such impact on me.. li hai..

oh muz remember..

4 things that make me smile:
* all my pets n animals
* jielun? haha
* dry day with no sweat -argggh-
* to sing n eat, esp when i have craving haha

4 ways to win my heart:
huh? write wat.. hmmz..
* muznt mind everthing bad abt me? lolx
* noe how to make me happy haha
* make sure there is chemistry n feel (n not maths n phy or computing.. haha=x)
* sense of security

4 things i believe:
* miracle* all the xu wu piao miao stuff...
* all the shen xian n god etc
* n everything but myself
4 things i'm afraid of:
* death of close ones
* not doing well
* making decisions
* regretting

4 things/people i want to see right now:
* the hardworking me
* the healthy me
* the happy me
* my sister

4 people who should do this:
* wanqi
* belly
* xuan zhi
* fgf

2006-02-27T23:18:00.000+08:00

想念你的歌
~~~~~~~~

是否曾经后悔过
那时候扶起说走就走
是否偶尔想过我
所以埋怨我每当听你的下落
逞强常常让人无法负荷
躲起来边哭边说 i miss you
还舍不得把你封锁

星光闪烁如何拥有
站在远方才看见星空的轮廓
虽然有时候会寂寞
墙上时钟停格
你说放开手才会快乐
用半生的脉搏写成想念你的歌

该怎么才能让你懂呢
谁对谁错已经模糊了忘记了
我们都处理得有点笨拙
已经从来没有像这一次如此爱过
想念常让我无法负荷
常常只有一个念头 i miss you
我的爱情从来没有死掉过

星光闪烁如何拥有
站在远方才看见星空的轮廓
虽然有时候会寂寞
墙上时钟停格
你说放开手才会快乐
用半生的脉搏写成想念你的歌

2006-02-21T11:31:00.000+08:00

another story i heard from music diary's say say only lolx..

to my friend...

there was once a son n his dad, wif a donkey going dunno where.. the dad sat on the donkey n began their journey.. soon they passed one person who exclaimed, "ai yoh, the dad is riding on the donkey, n how can the poor son keep up with the pace of the donkey?!? tsk tsk." upon hearing tis, the dad got down n asked his son to have the seat on the donkey while he himself do the walkin.. soon, they met another person who said, "ai yoh.. wat a son.. how could he ride on the donkey n let his dad do the walking?" after hearing tis, the son got his dad up to ride together. tis time, another person saw tis scene n sighed: "how cld the 2 person torture the poor donkey liddat? poor donkey..." the father n son got down immediately n so 2 guys n a donkey continue towards their destination. after a while, another person laughed at them n said, "both of u are real stupid.. y dont u make full use of the donkey n ride on it? haha." n he walked away still laughing at them..

这故事告诉我们什么？人言可畏。。。我们是很难满足身边每一个人的。世上有这么多人，如果做每一件事都得符合每一个人，那么人活着不是很累吗？人要看开一点，活得开心、对得起自己就好了。=)

smilez*

hope everyone of us, especially myself n not forgetting u-noe-who-u-are, will remember tis... life will be much ezier yeah...

2006-02-21T01:40:00.000+08:00

if u wanna noe how to have sore throat immediately for dunno wat reason, try the below:
- eat those prawn rolls, hei-bi-hiam. eat abt maybe 15-20? continuously.
- go n take a justea, lemon green tea out from fridge n drink half a packet immediately n continuously.
- wait for 1 hr.
sore throat awaits u...

n i got this sore feeling for no reason.. argh.. i wanna enjoy eating during tis not-any-bit-like-holiday holiday. stupid. how to enjoy this only slightest thing i can enjoy wif the sore throat? i have juz enjoyed one n 1st day of eating whole day leh.. looking forward to all meal times n break times hha.. so go away man argh. shoo, shoo.. it's not as if i nvr drink water? i drank the whole kettle n 3 cups of 凉茶。but looks like it is irreversible. -_- then have to get one thing down as each day passes. wat is tis.. tsk tsk.. n super wols me do everythign n anything so SLOWLY.. tsk tsk.. i going to go on holiday after tis man haha.. pple are getting crazier n crazier.. they dun seem to noe that they have juz thrown everything for everyone of us to complete within the so called break, wanna break us ah? lolx!!!! to add on to that, my stupid mind is not working correctly.. it is thinking of things other than sch work n studies.. super hom-xim.. super slack.. *shake headz* n dearest zhou gong seems to miss me a lot.. can i cold war wif him for like 2 weeks? dun find me so often la... n my hse is super non-conducive, super noisy.. wat is tis.. tsk tsk.. n one day down le.. ~~~

1st official day of "holiday". a bit not used to staying at home for the whole day.. lotx of memories about the last holiday came back. flashbacks of wat happened last time at the table.. i've got 4 more such days to go.. wld be occupied enuff n time wldnt past so fast, wldnt i... ...?

anw, watched campus superstar.. that boyboy who sing jia gei wo is gooda.. sat sat ah.. the lian-ai-ing boy boy is oso not bad.. too bad only choose 1.. if only i can kick out one finalist n replace wif my lian-ai-ing boyboy.. haha!!!! getting nicer to watch lo.. coz lesser pple left, n more pple who can sing.. enjoyment watching haha. oso looking forward to superband!! got a lot of kan4 tou2 ah that one.. but by that time dunno wat wil happen alrdy haiz..

sore throat can please go away? ='''( i am begging u alrdy argh.. xin ku leh..

2006-02-11T00:34:00.000+08:00

story for thot i heard on radio, me n my lousy translation but the story is still smt liddat..

there was once a guy who went for interview for a cleaner post at an internet company. aft interview n probation, he got the job. when signing agreement or contract, the person in charge asked for his email add. he said, "i dun have any internet connection at home nor did i applied for any email." as the company is some famous internet company(which i forgot it's name), it requires all it's workers to have a email add. as such, the man isnt employed. wif the US$10 he had wif him, he went to buy 10 potatoes at a supermarket n sold it hse by hse. managed to earn US$15. he con't n realised that such business is quite profitable. in the end, he set up a company doing delivery services hse to hse, door to door n earned a lot. business flourishes n became much bigger (越做越大). once day when buying insurance, the agent asked for his email add. he said, "i dun have any email add." the agent was very shocked and asked y wld the big boss of such a big company not have an email account. the man said: "if i had an email add, i wld have become a cleaner n not wat i am today..."

a bit superficial but the moral of story is still there.. dun be too bothered abt wat we dun possess. instead, try to be contented wif wat we have n sometimes, misssing stuff is a blessing in disgust. make full use of wat we possess.

however, i think i wld nvr digest the moral of the story. it's a blessing to be born complete one whole piece, have 2 proper eyes, a nose n everything. but sometimes, u juz have something else which u juz wish to change to make things beta. human beings are nvr contented i guess. but haiz, somethings are juz irritating. how i wish to lose part of my memory.. the part which i guess i will never ever forget coz it has "been wif me" for dunno how long.. the mind is really powerful in controlling everything. i really mean EVERYTHING. dun underestimate it's power. but mine is controlling in the wrong way haiz.. i wonder when will greatest wish ever come true.. i have lotx of things to do aft that=) well, believe in it n it is possible isnt it? hmmz.. thou i am starting to detest myself sometimes, i suddenly admire my bravery yest. but coz of that i landed myself in such a stupid mess of not being able to wash my hair yest. ARGH. very irritating. now then i appreciate such stupid things u have been doing everyday. lolx.

anw, it's VERY scary to realise that smt u thot has been a secret for dunno how long n nobody noes, is actually known to a lot of pple.. those u noe n those not v shou kind oso.. omg.. hope it is juz a small small incident.. =X but kpo me will try to investigate.. omg..

2006-02-03T23:28:00.000+08:00

i dunno if wat i had done 4 hrs ago is correct or not.. to help or not to help.. 帮也不对，不帮也不对。没有人能告诉我应该这么做。i am juz too indecisive, small small matters oso cannt decide. i cant settle big business oso argh.. nobody to advice me oso boo hoo... >_<

well.. i am juz too ez to bully n trust pple too much.. too softhearted.. 我做不到见死不救。think my friend oso hit tis weak point of me loh.. so the "angel" won n i juz helped my friend. shall not name names.. tis means that i have believe, once again, that he really mean wat he said.. *argh* i really hope since today, i can start believing him n he shall stop making me disappointed.. wake up ah boy... haiz.. i really hope wat i choose to do today is correct.. i shall believe him once again.. only i can be responsible for my decision today, hope there isnt any room for regret. 真的希望他会说到做到，回头是岸吧朋友。。我再次相信你，所以你不能令我失望。。。

haven had such a long talk wif my that friends.. slacking n eatin those new yr stuff at my comfortable hse, warming.. thou both if us are a bit worried abt stuff.. hmmz but well, it juz set me thinkig that i am actually very very fortunate alrdy.. no bank loan, not to mention the $2- --- of uni sch fees i owe the bank in 4 yrs time, our family dun owe the govt any money thou we always dio red bills haha but watever, we finished paying for the hse, my hse is very comfortable, i've got at least a bit of spare cash so i wldnt die of hunger, i can actually get wat i want, no burden, got sch to study thou very x.. i have got friends n a complete family thou not very well off.. we dun do evil nor 伤天害理的事，没做对不起自己良心的事 so not living in any guilt。。。that's very very good enuff le.. so i shall be complacent n be contented n stay happy..

i seriously think that simple is happiness.. 简单就是快乐。if only the world n pple is much simplier.. y cant pple juz be liek animals? liek my 2 hamsters.. go bersak n sqeak when u are hungry only haha.. but they are easily contented.. n they show their happiness very simplily.. they juz go run up n down n on the wheel very enthusiastically after i feed them n after i brought them out to run. that's ezly contented. that's a simple life.. but human beings are juz different from animals alrdy.. tsk tsk.. i want to be "myself" haha hmmz so juz stay simple yeah.. (",)

happy new yr

2006-01-29T03:35:00.000+08:00

To u-noe-who:

新年快乐!! say恭喜恭喜?? ha. thou i cant give u2 fishes n deco tis yr, but i noe uall will noe my wishes =) *muacks*

2006-01-27T23:02:00.000+08:00

sianz my previous post is gone have to retype argh... forgot wat i wrote thou. smt abt cny coming n tonnes of work to be done. ya. have been v busy earlier. whole mth passed so fast, but i haven learnt much. have been seriously lagging in my work. cny is a festive for celebration, visiting.. i have loads of relatives. 3 days isnt enuff. 4th day muz go back to sch, n have assignments n quizes coming up.. how the hell am i going to enjoy leh? tsk tsk.. it seems beta last time, at least there is still cny celebration loh, half day.. haha n teachers will understand n not give u test aft new yr. but watever. i cant do anything. muz seriously mug n mug aft new yr. aft my new yr mood. cannot not mug n i wil juz noe nothing => stupid.. argh..can juz visit me in lib aft new yr ba.. i need to do well.. anw, all tiger n tigeress can take a look===>

Tiger in the Year of Dog 2006

Constellations (Stars)Bai Hu(白虎) Tian Xiong(天雄) Di Sha(地杀).

Guards against damages, bodily operations and traffic accidents.

Disposition

The Tiger is stubborn but he possesses courage and is not submissive. They like stimulating challenges and they have strong fighting spirit. They are gentle on the exterior but tough in the inside. Handles matters seriously and they set high expectations for themselves. Very often, they use the attack strategy rather than defend which results in disappointments. Although their interest in money is not obvious but they know how make use of opportunity to increase their income. In the early years, the Tiger has already aspires to do business. Their management attitude is quite strong. When he is friendly, he gets bullied and taken advantage of. The Tiger’s mind is always advancing boldly and that is why they may become military leaders or big business entrepreneurs. It may be due to their persistence that led them to road of the success. Business partnership is not advisable for the Tiger as there will be disputes that results parting on bad terms. In love aspect, they are filled with rich sentiments. Their over sensitive and rash attitudes always put them in trouble. They are impulsive and tend to speak without due consideration often results in bad outcomes.

Marriage

The Tiger and the Horse is an ideal match as the Horse is honest and reliable. The Horse is able to win the Tiger’s affection. Do not marry a Snake as the intelligent Snake will never understand the Tiger’s style of handling matters. The Tiger with the Monkey match is not ideal as the Tiger fears the sly Monkey. The Tiger and the Pig match is average as the Pig has the spirit of being able to withstand hardships and tolerance. It enables the Tiger to respect and accept the Pig.

Luck

Tiger’s luck is not favorable this year. There is a presence of bad constellation. All business plans will be slowed down. With the assistance of business partners born in the year of Horse, Dog and Pig, it is able to eliminate danger for the Tiger. Human relationship is also a big headache. It is unfavorable in Summer season. You can hope for better luck in Winter season. This is the year where White Tiger constellation appears, one must pay extra attention as disasters of bloodshed will happen. With the Unicorn Amulet or having a pregnant woman at home, it is able to ward off the ill effects.

Career

There will be obstacles to career advancement for the Tiger. For those who want to invest in a business will feel that he/she has the ability but lack of strength. It is best to make plans in Summer and Autumn season. The most feasible time to execute the plan will be in Winter season.

Fortune Luck

The Tiger will suffer unexpected financial losses and accidents. Do not take risk in investments or visit gambling establishments. There is a possibility to fall into financial crisis in Summer and Autumn season. With careful finance management, one may meet the benefactor in Winter season which will in turn help the Tiger tide through difficulties. Do not act as a guarantor for anyone as this may lead you to incur monetary losses.

Health
There are bad constellations this year, threateningly leads the Tiger to be prone to bloodshed incidents. Pay attention to diet to avoid being sick. Do not drive after liquor consumption as there is a likelihood of traffic aFor those who are involved in high risk career, be extra cautious when executing jobs. Be more cautious in Summer season.

Romance
This year, the Tiger has a lucky constellation in love life. It attracts more choices for him/her. You will be able to find your ideal partner through participation in social events. Marriage may take place this year. The Peach Blossom constellation appears in lunar calendar February. Do not let the golden opportunity slip away.

Academic
The Tiger student will not excel in studies this year. To break through, one must study diligently. If you encounter problems with schoolwork, do not hesitate to consult your parents, teacher and classmates. During school vacation, one must revise and refrain from going out to play.

Auspicious Months
Lunar Calendar January, May, September and October
Inauspicious Months
Lunar Calendar April and July

Auspicious Items for Year 2006
1) Water Entering Pig Cage (􁊏􀫩􀥬􀹆)􀀡􀀡
2) Five Roads Strike A Fortune (􀾗􀬁􀛢􀔰)􀀡􀀡
3) Luck Turns The Universe (􁆱􁊪􀳌􀨲)􀀡􀀡
4) Luck Bestow From Heaven (􀝁􀗹􀻢􀤩)􀀡􀀡

The following auspicious items are to be hung on handbags or mobile phones.
For the Tiger, Horse and Rabbit horoscope, you must own any of the above auspicious items to strengthen your unexpected wealth. With the "Jade Emperor’s chant", it will increase the power of the item.

The Tiger has the White Tiger Constellation in the horoscope. Guard against accidents, sickness and bloodshed incidents. Be cautious on the roads. There may be funeral matters. Even if there is no bloodshed, financial losses is unavoidable. BUT if you have a marriage, it will ward off ill effects. Hang a Pig auspicious item, using the "Jade Emperor Chant" will increase the power of the item and ward off ill effects. Fulu Geomancy Centre offers this special service at Sin$38.
As the White Tiger opens its mouth on the 5th March 2006, it is believe that if one worships the White Tiger God, it will help you invite riches into your home. BUT a word of caution to those born in the year of Tiger, DO NOT worship the White Tiger this year as it is inauspicious.

Copyright © 2006 by Master Gwee

i wonder who is the master gwee, eric gwee's father ah? lolx... hope the red colour can help to shield off the unauspicious n bad n touch wood stuff. shoo shoo shoo haha. hope i din miss anything. i shall be diligent n mug like hell aft cny. i am super duper 迷信. hope to find a Pig auspicious item soon haha. thou i dunno if this is accurate or not.. but i very gia xi one, so beta play safe haha.. inform me if uall c anywhere har lolx!! so, happy new yr to all! 恭喜发财，万事如意，心想事成，学业进步 n many many more. hope the yr of doggy woof woof will bring lotz of happiness to all n good health, juz liek how happy n healthy a good dog is haha =)

2006-01-22T21:55:00.000+08:00

wah have a seriously busy weekend dunno y... it's new yr.. new yr's coming.. so damn busy wif dunno wat leh.. attempted a few qns of maths tut n that's it, my sat is gone. went shopping at je n i bought one top like a lot. super excited abt my 造型 on 大年初一. wahhahahaha!!! kk thou no point dressing up, nobody c n dun need be so excited but it's the only chance to dress up ma lolx.. n i will be so shuang the whole day. yesh it will definitely be a very long day haha. okay juz excited abt new yr. time alrdy flew when i came back, went to c my grandma for a while. her 气色 looks quite good, but she is complaining abt not hearing well, n not cing well.. hmmz juz hope she can come down during new yr. haha. went to did my 1st hair treatment. omg, inflation. esp during cny.. argh. but nvm, think its worth my money haha. think my hair is really softer, at least immediately aft the treatment. hope it will last for >1wk. haha. almost dead when i reached hm. dunno 摸 wat here n there n it's late. my maths tut seems to be sleeping pills n i am gone very soon.

went to move the almost the whole ntuc home. heard "他现在来了" from my sis when i am still sleeping. uncle desmond's on the way wif the car to drive us to ntuc. omg, i haven brush up, eat everything. okay. we moved a lot of things. poor sis paid for all haha.. so nice of her.. n lucky we got car. haha. if i really win a car, i shall lend it to uncle desmond to drive for the time being n i shall get him to ferry us rnd whahahaha. i attempted to bath the 2 of them juz now. okay succeeded. they are qte cute i muz say, thou still lost to my beloved xiao bai n yoyo ha. harvock. they leap n jump liek a frog. hope i managed to wash all excess shampoo off them man haha. i want them to remain so fluffy n say 恭喜恭喜 to all who come my hse next week man lolx!! kk maid for the rest of the day n more days to come.. but the 满足感 is there haha. juz that i dun have time to do my tut n catch up wif my work. omg. serious lagging. tis shall not cont aft new yr man.. ahha..

oh yah, joined hiphop wif baofei every wed loh haha!! baofei, very fun rit?!?!! haha thou my whole body, any part wif muscles are aching aft the 1st lesson, i am still enjoying it!! haha.. finally get to move aft 3 whole yrs man.. not to count those countable gym visits wif belly during holiday haha. yesh really countable wif one hand lolx!! juz hope my knee wldnt attract my attention aft the dance. *pray hard* it's still behaving aft the 1st lesson hehe. =)

2006-01-17T18:09:00.000+08:00

currently stuck wif 王力宏's kiss goodbye.. dunno y i in love wif the song, minus the few seconds at the ending. heard it on radio one fine day n suddenly have special feelings for the song. i like the composition, esp the organ (sld be?) part in the middle. haven take a look at the lyrics so dunno wat the song is taking abt. but i haven had such feelings 4 a song b4.. mayb coz i had 领悟 another special meaning of how wonderful music can be. go listen if uall have the chance. think the album is oso generally nice on the whole, the 曲风 sounds a little little bit liek jielun's i think. happened to click on some songs when adding them to "all audios", but apparently i cant add all 10 songs. can listen only by clicking on them. argh.. but nvm i wanna attempt burning them into DVD_RW later. all thx to my tu di,他害我啊lolx.. 害me switch on com non-stop alrdy. =P hopefully the DVD can work so that i can listen to it outside.

realised that i haven been very happy on the whole, i dunno y.. despite the arrival of festive season, i cant feel the joy when i AM NOT preparing for it in any aspect. i dun even mind cleaning up n spending so much time choosing all the new stuff. amazing. i wonder y. is this catagerized under sch reopen blues? i dun even noe if it exists for me in the 1st place, n sch has started 4 qte some time. i miss sch days LAST TIME. i miss CCA. tis is the 1st time my mind ran thru so many things upon hearing those new yr songs. moments of practices. sitting behind the red curtain, n shifting our chairs forward when it opens coz the stage is either too small or we are too big a gp haha. playing those songs every yr n dunno y it still "works" by giving us the mood. but now i dun get to play anymore. my yangqin at home is slowly degrading. wood is biodegradable. how i wish i cld juz lift the cover n play liek wat i used to. but wat i c now are either missin or rusty strings. ='( hope to be back to an orchestra.

wat i have been cing n observing actually disappoints me. i thot s-g-p pple can somehow click wif one another, but in fact i think they are actually dao loh. mayb, at some pt of time we tend to had generalized f-r-n-s to be diff from us, to a certain extend weird n hard to communicate. but infact i think that they can be qte ez to get along wif. at least they say hi when u happend to sit beside them during lec. they remember u. at least when u meet them along a corridor, n when u realised that we are going to the same location, u search for the place together n be friends after that. so simple. i dunno wat's some pple's prob. pple seems less friendly on the whole, not to say when u compare to schmates in sec sch or even jc. schmates = pple u dunno but in same sch (=\) friends. friends are of coz friendly. i noe that not all are lidat, maybe i haven meet nice s-g-p pple i noe. i wldnt generalise pple coz even twins r diff. but i dunno.. hope i will meet some nicer new pple if not at tis rate, dun be surprize that i paici those NEW s-g-p pple i noe.

but of coz definitely no offence to anyone. i love my old friends, yeah u reading haha. there is some amazing bonds which u cant study liek covalent or ionic bonds. i enjoy the morning today on the way to sch, 今天那偶然的相遇. despite the journey being juz <1hr, it feels much mroe than that. think i will enjoy my elective a lot =)

wx competiton n pageant

2006-01-13T23:37:00.000+08:00

whahah had 2 busy nit aft sch on wed n thurs. it's actually very tiring woh.. sch starting at 8.30 for 4 days is alrdy very tiring. somemore i am staying till nit time, n reached home at 10+ 11++ *tired man* well but it's quite worth it la, at least very for the wed nit...

went to wx's singing competition at nee ann poly.. wat "SOE superstar" wohx!! lolx we looked like aliens there. either we are too sensitive, or we are really weird coz pple there take labtops while i had 2 testbooks which i happened to get that day. well.. but the canteen there is superb.. thou food i ate is really cmi, ntu's much beta, but i liek the atmosphere there.. they play pop songs loh.. occassionally got "dj" talking.. liek 93.3.. it started playing jolin's song when we sat down.. so high loh.. *jealous* went into the audi quite early. had a very gd seat wif fang, rui, twin sis, miaoyue n liyin.. but 后来 wj asked us to join the supportors area.. oh well, we comtemplated coz our seats really gd ma.. but aft cing even pple liek wj, jian he are willing to sit there.. n got
"scolded" by him as usual haha.. but well, really, if u were upthere, its really a very good feeling to see all ur good friends at one area, isnt it.. n 既然我们是来支持他的，就应该支持到底。it's mroe meaningful tis way ba..so we moved to be liek crazy pple. yupz. we were doing wat u see on project superstar, juz that the banners n posters dun have weijian junyang kelly's face but wenxiang's... oh well.. enlarged pic till his face filled wif boxes haha! being the 1st one adds to the scaryness of competing ba i think. heard him sing beta b4 but think he did his bez that nit. oh well, nvm it's the expt loh seriously.. hmmz hope to have my chance soon lolx.. haha i dun wish to regret when i am old in future.. still got lotz to be fulfilled n tried.. but it's really very touching to be singing down there, wif ur friends, dun need fansi, friends will do, waving their lightstick to the music.. oh well, congrats to wx man.. but too bad i nvr take photo wif him argh.. had known him 4 so long n very extremly nan de he so shuai whahahhaha!!!! but think more pretty wif the make up on him lolx... n the hair, so wj's bro has some use afterall lolx.. =P nice performance afterall.. thumbs up for u that nit man!!

dun feel liek elaborating abt unipagent on thurs. really qte cmi.. the goodie bag really disappoint me.. maybe juz the voucher for the clothes can come to good use.. giving it to my sis n ask her to replenish her cloths ba haha.. got our share of ben n jerry icecream (sldnt have got the name wrong ba, i think..) coz we are really damn early. 丢脸得事还是不要elaborate haha.. self entertainment among me fang peiqin n becca for so damn long.. n they started very much later.. angry that stupid 阿信 of mayday lookalike.. really scared me when he juz come behind me n say "你们等很久了hor" n give the dunno wat smile n let us go in.. omg.. still haven got over how he scared me... esp when his eyes ain very small u noe.. lolx.. oh well.. glad that we got up bus before it crowds..

2nd week has passed omg.. i have been laggin for 2 weeks.. needs lotz of catching up. but sometimes, how much u 付出 may be much lesser than how much u 得到. makes me feel a bit 心灰意冷。。。perhaps being ignorant may be beta lo.. but no choice.. 人生短短几十年，要好好把握眼前，快乐的过日子. will try not to tink abt the demoralizing part n enjoy the present ba.. haha like being excited abt yan zi's concert tml? haha.. yeah~

2006-01-07T23:31:00.000+08:00

time seems to fly n it has been a very long time since i last took the bucket n take water out of a fishtank.. i dunno where on earth i got the courage to face the pipes, the bucket n the fish tank n water n clean the tank so swifty.. i haven forgot how to change the water in the tank.. everything seems juz like yesterday.. juz that i am going to a different tank wif a different fish inside.. maybe bocz i am afraid of that scene.. i dun wish for history to repeat itself, n regretting coz u dun have the chance to fulfill ur promise coz of a difference of 0ne day.. n a healthy fish to get sickish bcoz of dirty wateer?!? it's very bad.. i cant bear to see a helpless fish suffer liddat.. n walk away to use the com again pretending that i have seen nothing? never.. i will regret for life if anythign happened bcoz of my "ignorance". even thou i was so comfortable coz i had juz bathed n i dun liek getting dirty after that, i told her that i will change water for her.. wait for me to switch off my com.. she wasnt moving.. but her fins are sweeping swiftly.. she seems so 辛苦 till i was so scared.. my stupid dad haven been changing water for her since dunno how long ago.. i have been nagging at him for a long time n he keeps on giving me false promises.. i knew she wld get sick sooner or later if she continues in that tank.. her body is growing bubbles n little white spots.. somethings juz cannot wait.. u own a pet so u sld give it comfort n it's animal rights.. juz bcoz it cant speak doesnt mean tt it sld suffer in silence.. it's useless complainign n i sld get smt done myself, wait for him? forget it... luckily xiao xiao is actually a strong n healthy girl, if not it couldnt survive under such harsh living condition bcoz of a bad owner.. luckily, i have adopted yoyo from the stupid owner.. if not he wld have suffered much especially wif his weaker health..

thou i am still using the same pipe n bucket, the feeling is totally different.. 我并没有看见yoyo的影子，他在哪里呢？？。。我们大家都有些害怕，和以前完全不一样。以前根本不需要感到害怕，可以随意地把手放进水里，因为yoyo根本不会咬人,他也认得我、我的手、也知道我是来帮他换水的。我突然好想念摸他的感觉，和他说话的时候，他看着我的眼神，和一切与他有关的一切。。。但现在却。。。

我想念去年的冬天
下着雪的那一夜
你给的温柔紧握的双手
温暖整个寒冬

失去了曾经的拥有
在你离开以后
带走了笑容只留下寂寞
忘了幸福是什么

没有你的夜特别的漆黑
只能闭上双眼去感觉
没有我的夜谁在你身边
代替了那个从前

能不能再听一次你说爱我
回到还在你怀里的时候
能不能让我再一次拥有
曾属于我的温柔

thinking of u on one chilly nit...

2006-01-03T23:18:00.000+08:00

more picz of my fulfilling holiday, n how i spend my last few days of 2005...

1stly, hwee n hl, i found back the pic alrdy!! cant kill me le haha. got 2 so juz take ur pick ba lolx..

http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c92/sunsetsteo/PIC_0009.jpg

http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c92/sunsetsteo/PIC_0008.jpg

tis photo if wj making his wish to a cup of tomato sauce is foudn together wif the above lolx..

that day wif

~fang

~long lost ky

~n huang zx

n i realised i never take any wif belly n zb oppz... how cld i forget 大美女！！！

that day at mei's concert...
与小学同学的偶然相遇=)

n ang sl kept on taking her 自恋照...

then finally 舍得 to snap for us...

~bez friendz!!

~me wif ah nan!!

~n the 4 of us at the place wif most lights lolx..

n 2b outing on last day of the yr...
haven seen them for a real long time...

then overnit at fang's placE afterthat!

~1st thing to do in yr 2006 is to dye my hair!!! lolx

~acknowlegment:
FANG for her hse n helping me u noe wat lolx!!
RUI for the dye
MEI for reading instructions
LALA N FANG'S BRO for being new 2006 david gun for liek 1 hr? haha
n FANG'S MUMMY for 客串ing
=)

2005 has ended.. n it's another brand new yr ahead.. had a very beautiful end to tis long yet short yr wif all the wonderful gatherings n time spent. have met all the pple i wish n sld meet i think, except jingli newer laogong!! sorry, 2006 yeah? paiseh paiseh.. hope such a wonderful month could help me remember all pleasant abt 2005 n imply a perfect start for the 2006 ahead... =)

2005-12-30T02:19:00.000+08:00

finally met hl hwee n maine.. n not forgetting wc... haha it has been so long since we met... so ncie chatting wif maine on our way there.. dun need to think of topics, anything oso can say, juz so comfortable.. hmmz hope to dio4 one elective same as her next sem ah!! so we can see each other at least once in sch each week lolx!! dearest hwee still manage to make us laugh hysterically(or izzit only me who 不顾形象? =X) haha very funny.. her vocab like "ovalish calves" are ever laughin medicine.. those biodata of pple omg.. i never go n noe so much last time haha.. n our dearest tanned babe meet us for lunch n eat lunch at home herself haha=P think we sat there for liek almost going to 2 hrs.. n laugh so loudly.. (okay it's me..)

BUT!!!
but!!!
BUT!!!!
I DUNNO WHERE HAVE OUR PHOTO GONE TO!!!!
I DUNNO!! I REALLY DUNNO!!! i din delete it!!! i swear
i will go consult owner of camura tml.. dun kill me....
SORRY!! SORRY!!! sorry hwee.. sorry hl.. sorry maine..

it's a pity if it is really gone leh.. coz i personally think it's really nciely taken.. (not bcoz it seems to be the only photo without hl's hand?!? haha) nolah, it's really nciely taken.. if, if, if *touch wood* it's really gone n cannot be found, we will have to wait for 3 more mths b4 we can take again.. =‘（

i juz cant have a successful attempt when i borrowed someone else's digi cam...photos can actually disappear by itself loh.. oh heaven, drop a digi cam for me ba.. it will be MINE n i can use it successfully then lolx.. yesh, i want to OWN a digi cam.. but no money haiz.. 从天掉下来吧！！

walked to cityhall wif hl n maine.. it doesnt matter even if it's raining haha.. bidded goodbye to the 2 of them n as USUAL, wx is late. wj is oso late coz he knows that wx will be late.. win liao loh.. everytime liddat left poor me.. =( but time pass very fast when u are doing things haha..i meddling wif my new bag hehe very nice.. eating cartel wif them an interestin expt.. i noe y we can be good friends for so long coz we are all so indecisive haha.. made wj a bit happy by spliting the money btw 2 of us haha.. treat him leh, of coz muz b happy haha.. coz he needs money now of all the things haha.. if only py is here.. can eat more n pay less =P

making an official appeal for ong py to turn up the next time we go out!! argh.. that woman.. hahah i noe le.. i will paste her face on our photos n force her to use it as her msn pic haha.. =P i will, give me some time haha

we ate a heap of sauces.. the remaing one is creatively utilized by wx to be wj's bday cake.. n the flag on our "burger" is e candle.. n wj really play along wif us haha.. ask him pretend to make a wish n he really did.. but i dunno where had the stupid photo die to, AGAIN?!!? but he poor thing.. the bday girl at the table beside us had a whole cake whereas here oppz.. sld really bought a cake for him hor？ stupid me.. =X okay, i noe wat to buy for them next yr le..

no pic of him making a wish.. so make do wif a pic of him taking his pathetic bday "cake"
looks nice actually lolx!!

hehe finally had a proper recent photo taken wif them.. shall paste py in n send for printing.. yesh i will use tis..

wx wrote the card opposite wj while i entertain bday boy. he 顺便 took tis pic for us haha..

n wx's turn..look at his idiotic face haha.. dun want to post his nicer photo.. n the 2 of them refuse to take one together.. then we gave him our 仅新制作的 bday card.. haha.. n i know he really digested wat we written hehe that's not all yet hah.. n we finally gave him his present...

his monkey fav food/fruit haha.. yesh, only we will do tis.. haha c how happy he is.. hope he had a memorable 19th bday haha.. 20th will be better i promise..

time spent wif them is always forever so funny.. their language n things they do are really out of ur imagination haha.. look forward to cing them soon ah.. i will make sure that they dun 重色轻友/亲友?? watever lah haha.. spent a generally relaxing n damn happy day, both afternoon n at nit.. it feels bez to be urself n enjoy man=)

kk picz: specially deDicated to ong py.. post for u to c loh.. if not i wldnt post all haha.. 快点感动哭lolx!! regret not coming? haha.. =P

anw, wx got into dunno wat singing competition n each got $100 budget for promotion..is tis suitable for making poster?

har, i juz conclude that he sldnt take pics, if not his idiotic face juz appears.. lolx

2005-12-30T01:49:00.000+08:00

Heyz,pic of my new hamsters.. i have thot of new names for them, 小坏蛋 n 小顽皮.. wat uall think of that? haha...

their condo, no, sld be terrace hse? i dunnnoo..definitely not hdb

"你在拍我吗？" lolx!! can u c 2 hamsters? haha

close up..

caught you haha!! eat n eat n eat non stop

"放我出来！！！"

haha a few nicer ones.. i dunno who is who.. decided to take mroe pics of them n as they grow up.. to prevent lesser regrets in future.. *touch wood*

2005-12-28T01:41:00.000+08:00

sobz sobz, i have to remove the nice nice song i mentioned earlier coz it seems to have some prob n crashes pple's com.. haha so i have to remove it... ='( but lao gong's song oso nice haha

anw, nice song here.. interesting lyrics

星星之火 - S.H.E
女孩　越过小路爬上了山丘
那时的她　还不懂为什么　萤火虫都不动
停驻在夜空　点亮了小小宇宙

女孩　慢慢长大却还是　懵懂
那时的她还不懂　为什么大人们能抽空
为失恋喝杯酒却没空看看星空

"不要　不要不要　忘了做过的梦"　
天上星星　彷佛听她述说　兴奋地闪烁

我要变成那一颗星星　整夜都亮晶晶　
不怕阴暗的黑影　骄傲地闪不停
Shining Shining Shining　亮丽到月儿都妒忌
灿烂的一颗星星　一生也亮晶晶　
因为夜归的背影　有了我的指引
Shining Shining　勇气就在你手心

女孩　不再单纯却不够　成熟
这时的她　虽然懂　为什么　美丽总有哀愁
每当有泪儿流　却回到那个宇宙

女孩　有天将会到哪里　出走
哪时的她　总会问　为什么　一个梦那么重
只希望放弃前　能想起那片星空

"不要　不要不要　忘了做过的梦"　
天上星星　彷佛听她述说　兴奋地闪烁

Twinkle twinkle little star
how I wonder what you are.
Believe, believe, believe, you are the only star.

我要变成那一颗星星　整夜都亮晶晶　
不怕阴暗的黑影　骄傲地闪不停
Shining Shining Shining　亮丽到月儿都妒忌
灿烂的一颗星星　一生也亮晶晶　
因为夜归的背影　有了我的指引
Shining Shining Shining　勇气就在你手心

A long time ago, a little girl wanted to find her future. She went to the mountains and asked the sky "Where's my future ??"And just then, a little star said "Sweetie, the future is in your hands !!"
Yes, the future is in our hands...

2005-12-28T00:39:00.000+08:00

SA class outing:

teo ming yong n teo ming fen lolx!!

all of us!! haha

*special thanks to gor's "camura"

bez friends, known since omg: primary school!!

me.rui.fang.lala
(to my horror, i have a very round chin when the pic is very big!! *very scary*!!! i am getting frightened... muz watch my diet le..) ='(

*special thanks to lala's camura

too lazy to upload those wif s13 girls.. go hl or the other's blog c la haha

2005-12-27T23:46:00.000+08:00

slacking time flies liek dunno wat.. tsk tsk.. everyday passes by so fast.. haiz.. i haven got any physical things done, like clearing my notes for new ones to come..

yeah went to S13 CLASS outing, yeah a class lolx.. quite a lot turned up.. had a very great time cooking n eating.. juz that it's tooooooo smoky.. so scary, n SMELLY!!! argh.. wld prefer the "stall" we went for 4C outing.. but nvm, it's de time spent.. juz enjoyable.. haiz dunno if i will get to enjoy such enjoyable n relaxed time when sch reopens..can juz b urself haiz *shake head* but nvm, 希望在next sem.. lolx.. lucky i went, coz i actually wondered if i sld go b4 leaving the hse coz my family juz came home when i am leaving n devil came n said that i wld be very smelly when i returen lolx. never regret listening to angel n not devil.. haha one of my 不后悔decision haha.. oh ya, muz thank wei for her photo!! (hope u will read tis when u come back lolx!!) n si hui for the xmas card.. really read it when i come home, juz feel so 感动。。。hand made one k haha.. n yah, huiling merry xmas.. i've juz received ur card haha!! postman went on leave during public holiday le ha!

n yah, very happy for a friend.. u noe who u are.. cannot say too much later got pple who ain supposed to c saw.. haha =P got good feeling abt that, so good luck n enjoy k!! haha

mei mei came today to use com.. well hope her prob abt bidding can be solved asap.. hmm haven had such a good time talking to her for dunno how long le.. hmmz.. kept feeding her wif food haha!! thou it's juz 2-3 hrs but it pass soo fast.. time pass v fast when u are enjoying it ba.. n she helped me set the "program" for writing chinese!! 所以我现在可以很自由的写华文字了!! haha finally.. so long since my com got sick haha.. but coz my sis came home n it's late n i muz cook of all the days, haven been a good host.. but think she wldnt mind rit? =X coz good friends are those who juz come n open the fridge urself n sit on sofa wif legs on coffee table.. haha juz like the 2 pigs.. will be meeting them on thurs, n i purposely went to borrow camura to take photos wif them coz i noe they wldnt have haha.. looking forward to thur, busy thurs...

bf: the song is 发如雪.. but i going to change it to another mp3 for a while coz i am only allowed to host the mp3 for 7 days so muznt waste.. will change back n support my husband after 7 days, lolx!! hope the one for the next 7 days is nice too!! hehe

stupid, hamsters

2005-12-26T15:51:00.000+08:00

haiz sch's gonna reopen.. i dun have enuff time to slack.. =( haiz.. the thot of sch reopening is scary.. the subjects i am going to study, haiz.. was given a chance to avoid those stupid subjects, but yet i din response to it on time n missed the good chance... it was sad that it is not reversible n this makes my chances changing my previous "choice" very very extremely slim isnt it...? now i dunno if i sld take one step out n try my luck of changin the highly-impossible.. haiz.. sometimes too much choices is a bad ting, i hate making decisions coz 9 out of 10 times i will regret.. haiz.. they gave me a good opportunity n i din make full use of it haiz.. does it mean that i have to face the consequence of a scary n forseen-very stress n hard next sem? tsk tsk.. programing language is very scary..then i have to face all the bonds n acids AGAIN.. n dunno wat phy next sem again.. haiz.. is tis called zi zuo zi shou? if really so, i promise i will try to be more decisive n remember to reply emails in future.. *argh*... kill me..

feels as if a knife is pointing into my heart when i think abt it.. ahhhhhh...

anw, promised to talk abt my cute hamsters.. haha tentatively called them bai chi (eat for free) n bai he (drink for free), so when i call them together, it will be: "bai chi bai he" haha n considering "yi mo yi yang" haha.. gave my dad few sets of numbers to buy, n one of them is 8782 (bai chi bai he) but no luck.. but still, my dad loves them a lot!! feed them vege leh!! n the 3 of us juz surround the cage n laugh at them.. beri entertaining.. they are very very cute!!never had 2 hamsters kept together so i never knew that they are so funny together.. they fight, n i wil be knocking the cage to stop them. but they oso care for each other, like help each other groom their fur.. snatch food, n water.. run on wheels together. haha. they know now to climb the stairs to 2nd story "overnit".. coz i brought them up to drink water n when i came back, they were liek having activity up there suddenly haha.. beri funny.. have to watch them urself to really know how funny they are.. haha welcome anyone to visit them worh! but they are so small.. identical.. i cant differentiate them despite staring at them for dunno how long.. but i forsee that one wil be fatter than the other soon.. maybe coz more glutton? cant run as fast? or maybe weaker health? i dunno.. vet teo is making her speculations.. they shall be under further observation.. haha but of coz i hope for the previous 2 situations as the cause of her fatness.. yah, both are female i think haha.. so cuteeee..!!!

but they are different from xiaobai la, xiao bai is not as naughty n dirty, thou as picky haha.. i shall toilet train them soon..

busy

2005-12-24T01:10:00.000+08:00

i am so busy, tired, i dun have enuff time to rest n slack n do my own things. the house is 4ever messy.. yet i am not working.. where have all my time gone to? suddenly feel so tired.. exhausted maybe a better word..

thou i love to shop, i enjoy shopping for other pple even more. give me ur budget, the quantity u want, i can survey the whole orchard for the whole day, help u queue to pay at the forever long queue at taka.. everything seems as if it's free.. yup, that's wat i did for my sis.. but have to wait for her approval b4 buying.. so i am capable of staying in watson for 1 hr.. juz grap as thou u are buying for urself to get the satifaction, then she pays wahaha.. xmas is really an occassion to help stimulate the economy..

thou i wasnt involved in such great scale xmas xchange, i still "played my part" in improving spore's economy by really spend a lot on dunno wat the heck i spent on.. really dunno.. but i seem to have the one n only fulfilling shopping trip yest. got wat i have been "needing".. but i am juz so indecisive n fickle-minded n expandable-contractable.. so i need to go down again tml to change haiz.. did my accounts n omg it can total up to almost $400.. impressive huh? stupid smrt, gv, those food outlets n shops here n there, kbox n pool ntuc etc etc etc sld all thank me for improving their sales n business.. going to be bankrupted soon..but have decided after lotz of things on my mind n realised i sld play my part as a good daughter n help my mum look for new yr clothes.. met n will be meeting almost all i need n sld n promised to meet, so now it's some time for family? haiz, no enuff time for me to use..

oh yah, time.. wrapping present on a large scale basis can be quite interesting. but i started at like 11.30pm-12am n ended at 1 plus 2am for the past 2 days.. sometimes i wonder y am i so nic3 to sacrifise my sleeping time for smt not related to me but the whole lot of pple at kino.. haha but there are really really very nice pple there.. they gave xiaobai to my sis as 21st bday present. now that they know abt her departure, 2 of them got hamsterS as xmas prez for my sis.. yes, hamsterS.. 2 cute tiny winni little dwaft hamsters.. but both me n my sis's 1st reaction upon cing them was not a happy "har!!!" but a "har...?" maybe to them they thot that 'we are sad, we cry coz we lost a hamster so we have no hamsters at home, v sad.. ' but to us, it's not a hamster, but someone in ur life has left u.. cant replace.. it's not as if seeing 2 more cute hamsters can make us happy n forget abt xiao woh woh.. it's not something "material" but "mental".. but they never expt b4 so they duno lah.. but one of them is really someone very very extremely terribly nice.. her workers are so xin fu.. yah, so so nice of them..

but i seems to become they officialy baby sitter alrdy.. explain next time, dozing off when tying le.. tsk tsk.. i juz need mroe time per day/less things to do n think/a palm top or a business phone to really jot down lotz of countless things floating thru my tiny brain..

my dearest...

2005-12-19T20:27:00.000+08:00

my results for econs is out.. to think of it, i seriously dun think i will do well for it at any point of time, starting since that faithful nit.. my state of mind at tt point of doing the exam is perhaps, on average only 50%.. it's quite scary to do an exam not concentrating, ur mind is really floating somewhere else, the feeling of not concentrating is really quite scary.. u dun seem to know wat u wrote, seems to forget which part u did, almost did both the "either" n "or" part, on the verge of not finishing the last question, scribbled to finish the last part n really stop writing when the person says time's up.. ur mind really starts functioning n tuning to econs mode when u are almost halfway thru the paper.. what u thot dun seem to tally wif wat u wrote.. doing a paper after such traumatizing expericence is very hard.. sitting thru it n trying to concentrate is oso very tough.. the journey home is even worst, coz u totally dun care abt exam anymore n ur mind is fully occupied wif that.. i have totally no expectations of that paper at all, even flunking the paper does not matter.. i dun mind retaking or having a bad score on the results slip 4 yrs later.. it's a lie if i say that i am not sad wif a bad grade, but i wld be fine after at most a day or 2, coz i have decided n believe that watever that grade is, it is delicated to the both of u.. so no matter how bad it is, i wldnt mind..... but if i happened to be lucky enuff to score on watever i wrote, i will juz be contented n be glad that i have actually digested wat i had learned for these 3 yrs in total..... but a grade higher than the highest i have expected is totally a miracle.. miracle is the only word... lin2 xing4 is the only explanation.. i have never doubted u b4 n it has been proven correct once again.. i cant believe it, i dunno how to be happy.. oh my...

sat 17th

2005-12-18T13:29:00.000+08:00

still dunno how the registeration for subject works..i juz cant seem to check anything.. the thot of having to take chem AGAIN spoils the day.. the realisation that results are coming out very soon sweats.. have totally no idea when exactly it wants to come out, y cant they juz give a date or wat.. so mafan.. dunno how to check when is our add-drop date, but they say is 30th 11-12.. how on earth do they check?!? but if it's really so, i cant go sentosa alrdy.. i will try to find out...

going to victoria brought back lots of memories, especially the journey from city hall n not from raffles... it's liek 6 yrs ago?? haha.. that funny incident which i think only a few pple know... well i shant say here then hehe.. but now, it's 6 yrs later, we have all grown up n matured... buddies haha.. haha.. =D

at some point of time, u will suddenly realise that u have actually sorted out ur thots.. the feeling is quite good, n u will somehow be much happier.. nature will take it's course n u cant do much.. so well, enjoy everyday to it's fullest n dun think so much, n never think too much...

qiang yan huan xiao bu hao shou...
wo hui hao hao zhen xi na xie zhen xin peng you... =)

busy week

2005-12-17T00:36:00.000+08:00

uhoo, have been so bz till no time to really blog? haha letz c.. hmm went out wif s13 girls on tues, so happy to be wif old friends.. we can juz talk n talk when we c one another haha everyone bz wif their own things, so many things to update one another, so it's better to find a place to sit down haha..nice time chatting leh.. oh, hl the tanned babe liao loh lolx.. but i still seem the same leh, dont i? hmm haha.. but anw, that's another quality day spent!!!=) took lotz of pics here n there haha, a bunch of zi lian pple taking pic haha but we enjoyed ourselves. haiz but still have to wait till dunno when then i can get the picz, stupid com.. oh yah!! dinner was damn delicious, my chao-guo-tiao of $8.90 is oso heavenly haha.. i am scared that i will e addicted to thai xpress.. =X haha looking forward to mon!! hehe but might not be able to go sentosa on the 30th.. trying hard to arrange at the moment =Z

went ntu library on wed!!! going back to library during sch holidays?!? haha not so crazy to start muggin now k haha set up my own station at the com area: mp3, working web msn etc haha juz liek at home using net but now wif aircon n faster speed net= SHUANG3.. haha amazed that i can actually got so many things to do online, not including bloggin leh hmm..

thurs.. oh sushi buffet.. hehe 13.90++ buffet, my lunch n dinner..hmm stomach's elasticity has fallen i think tsk tsk..oh wat happened man!!! but i strongly believe tat i have worth back my $14++.. if only we stay longer, i will be eating more.. still miss those days that 4 of us used to eat the buffet.. still the bez companion i feel hahaa =O hmmm when will the next time be neh? shi guo jing qian loh.. managed to shop at je cum imm for like 2-3 hours myself? finally got some shou huo!! it seems to be the first day i started spending on some physical things since holi starts huh.. but die liao, i sign card sign till shuang shuang alrdy... sharks.. cant see the money so wldnt feel the pain, i get it.. haha but still, hehe..

went to k wif fang n belly today. oh my god, that was so shuang..it has been dunno how long since i last k..b4 exams? i really really really sing till very shuang n happy.. so many new songs that i cld sing haha.. thou a bit disappointed that they still haven got some songs liek tian hui n jielun's feng, lang man shou ji, ai yah all the rest they dun have.. opps, jielun haven finish filming some haha.. but i still damn shuang haha..very high haha..singing is my life man.. oh belly,our disasterous u noe wat haha!! but it's not our prob hohoho.. hopefully the next coming k-ge time will be liek next week wif my cousins!!! another "gathering" yet to be down.. muz arrange again.. hehe n my stylo milo secret wif fang =X heh-heh-heh *winkZ*

meet mummy at ps.. there is actually a lot of pple who wanna watch chicken little loh, the seats left is 2nd from the front? gave it a miss.. but when wil i get to see it?!? ='( went rnd n rnd to wait for time.. weird combi when zd came n starts blabbering abt his officer life..=Z but lucky time flew when we literally went rnd n rnd to wait for time to meet them Ah.. haha nice feeling to see those sa class pple!!! haven seen koi n zd since i left i think.. a bit weird at first but ok lah.. zd nvr change, still as wo xing wo su. actually not shou wif koi but haha seems more shou now loh.. he is same as chrys, dunno wat they talking, so fast n soft eng haha.juz that chrys more blur haha.. yx is oso as blur too! haha my dearest mingfen is finally here! haha i guess that we still have the bond since almost 3 yrs ago,dont we? hehe but miss her lotz man.. woh 3 yrs so fast.. gor is still happily attached wif da sao.. wanna married liao lah.. hehe.. both of them graduating so soon, looked shagged during mist of pia-ing fyp.. poor thing, then one going ns, one furthering studies at ntu, but not my course mate ='( haha n mummy, still so nice n funny.. we still have the same frequency hehe..

we are all as indecisive as b4 i muz say haha..all so ke qi lolx. sitting at the chrystal jade really seem so much like grandpa bringing 3 generations to dine la ha.. really started chatting at hans..the art of talking wif the eye n laughing as if we are drunk? so many so many things.. haha n those stupid "games", oh man i juz dun have a flar for those haha.. *bang* n i still dunno haha.. seems liek those days.. beri very happy to meet them again.. think the next gathering wld be somewhere next yr after gor n mf's exams n b4 gor go shave botak? =P he promised to drive us for supper, i wldnt forget hehe.. bao zai wo shen shang haha. never regretted going sa for 1st 3 mths n knowing such great friends.. once a saint, always a saint.. =) really hope to keep in close contact in times to come.. highly possible rit? hehe

i am going to be pok soon.. next week n the week to come are waving hello to my money... but nvm haha i "rich"...
...ur head. but some things are juz worth much more than money ^_^

hehe so happy...

2005-12-12T12:31:00.000+08:00

my com is spoilt, AGAIN!! The tool bar below is gone, lotx of missing things n everywhere are juz greyish strips that looks scary.. all e applications r not found!! can't listen to mp3, cant use proper msn.. but well, i can still find some unorthodox mtd to survive some times of the day... sianz.. i juz hope that i can get it reformatted asap without losing any data.. ='( heeelpppp

sunday finally came n haha yesh damn enjoyable.. =) beaming from the bottom of my heart lolx.. anw, pple dun believe in california fitness centre. they bluff pple like mad 1.. they can ezly lower the joining fees by almost $200.. tis instead made me boil.. n i got a damn high fat percentage.. die liao loh..pls tell me they are bluffin me.. luckily i went out wif my lao peng you-s aft that.

haven seen ky for liek 1 yr? finally got him out.. that bz ky.. but feelin is still there, i mean purely old old old good good friend that i haven seen for sooo long n miss soooo much haha.. the 6 of us hiked our way to millenia walk juz a have a cup of coffee. really cant trust stupid zx's sense of direction in future.. haha fang saved us from paying extra service charges at tcc by putting up a impromtu act.. haha those good old funny gao xiao days are back.. but we dun mind lolx.. ended up at starbucks n drank our kopi, as if we r at coffee shop lolx... it's damn nice to really sit down n talk talk liddat.. =)

clever me had selected a very self sufficient area which has almost everything hah^_^ so we went pooling at marina which is of coz walkable distance away..i ended up "washing" the floor for them.. =( but i can conclude that ky is my bez pool competitor liao coz we of similar standard haha!! no lah joking, very entertaining, dunno how to describe.. mayb tis is wat i call quality enjoyable time wif old pal haha.. zb is damn shen, shen himself n shen when guidin me.. all impossible hits became possible dunno y.. i wanna change shi fu le, n dun wan lousy wx liao haha.. think i still need lotz n lotz n lotz of practices.. jio me out for pool session k,haha!! belly has qie cuo skills wif nus pple n become pro le.. so i have always recognized her skills n i assume she can win all of us? haha actually i dunno abt their battle there haha.. n thou i managed to win zx for 2 games, i lost terribly for e 3rd game.. y leh, coz i rang4 him one wahahha, dun care.. haha ok, i admit that i am juz pure lucky that's all.. >_<

hao jing bu chang zai, ky got to book in @ nit ='( so cant join us for feast, yesh feast aft that.. no worries, shall find him out next time again.. shall post the picz when my com is okay.. got bluffed by the 2 z-s n had an ez trip to lao ba sat by paying $1.20 each to the taxi uncle.. n the 2 of them actually walked there.. *angry* somemore dun wanna tell us they walked here n let us wait so pathetically?!? nvm.. feast awaits us: 2 hugh stingrays, chicken satay, fried you tiao,fried hokkien mee.. omg.. heavenly.. i am up there wif wings lolx.. my long awaited stingray haha.. luckily i have always trained my stomach to be able to contain large volume of food..the table of food is no kick to me lolx.. stomach elasticity= -1?? haha!!!! toked a lot..=) n i can conclude that we have attained another higher stage of u noe wat haha!! thou i think all of us wld have french nitmares all thanks to our french freak wahahaha~~ but i muz admit, that aids a lot..but not too much okay zx hahaa

nit scenes are nice, those pals are even much nicer, so is the time spent wif them.. but i juz dun understand y there isnt any slightest wind yest nit.. haha nevertheless, shall look forward to the next meeting wif them again (hmm wat abt xmas n new yr time?) haha.. the fun n joy is in-describable..i hereby take back all the complains i had b4 officially, afterall complains are part n parcel of our lives rit? hehe.. i take back all the cursing n swearing of organizing, n yesh i wil be doing so again n now n in the future hehe.. somethings are kept inside each n everyone of hearts n we know it deep down ourselves, dont we? haha.. ^_^

we dun really act like wat we really think at times..
if only i can turn back time..

sianz

2005-12-08T12:30:00.000+08:00

well, sometimes i juz wonder wat's abt life.. i have mastered sleeping for more than half a day these few days... it really dun feel good when u are sick.. waking up a few times in the middle of the nit, hearing sounds like the squeaking of the wheel.. seeing xiaoxiao look so much like u that nit makes me really wonder if u had came to see how i am.. well juz sick.

money, y is everyone working so hard for? money.. it's quite sad to be tis way.. but we have no choice, rit? sld we juz spend the money on something physical so that u can see wat u own? or give the money to some stupid organization which is so damn hard to get back any returns.. juz like throwing some pple's hard earned money into the ocean.. i am not being selfish... but juz cant take it...

friends, how do u exactly define a good friend? someone that lend u a blue colour pencil when he has only one black colour one left for himself? or someone who stands up for u when u are being bullied? or wat.. or someone that makes u feel appreciated.. like all that u have did for him or her is greatly appreciated.. there is no need for any physical gifts or wat, it's juz a feeling.. sometimes it's juz one way traffic.. you lai mei you wang.. it's not abt asking for any returns, but i dunno... for so much effort that u put in, wat u get back is juz a "not very good liddat".. or no reply at all as if u send the msg to a wrong person, not juz once but a lot of times.. juz a bit fed-up at times.. but when u spend time wif them, (tis usually happens if occassionally once in a blue moon, there is a 2 way traffic but not controlled by me...) the feeling is juz great.. good friends... bestest friends.. beyond words that can be described... well, maybe it will juz continue to be liddat..maybe coz i m stupid or maybe tis is how u treat someone that u feel is a good friend. u make them feel appreciated (but they juz ain thankful or wat).. sometimes, u juz have to do the sacrisficing.. getting stuck between friends n family, btw money n gathering, btw some promise, some words u have said n someting that suits ur way... it juz dun feel good to be in dilemma... i dun like to make decisions... libras juz cant make decisions.. but now, i have to do the sacrisficing..n benefiting someone elses.. n indirectly causing someone to have to "suffer" wif me..i dun wish tis to happen too..

lying on bed for too many hours makes one think of too many rubbishish topics...

but u still have to come up wif wif a final decision.. haiz.. shall try not to organize anything in future liao sianz..

sometimes we sld juz learn how to control ourselves...

To: yoyo n xiao bai

2005-11-29T02:37:00.000+08:00

my dears, it has been 5 days since u left me, 5 days since i last had ur cute little eyes staring at me..but it seems liek years, thousand million yrs.. i could never forgive myself for not giving u more time on the last day n trying hard enuff to understand wat u are really trying to tell me.. instead, i choose to complain to u abt my studies, how much i cant finish n get in n ask u to bless me.. n u really take it seriously n left to bless me forever din u... if i could really turn back time, i really dun mind not studying on the last day n stand by u the whole day.. yet, life juz make a fool of pple by making u lose smt when u least have the time n attention for it.. y, y of all days did i choose to concentrate by staying in the room more for a longer time than other days, when i would normally walk towards u n juz say a simple hi for more than 20 times a day at home.. y, of all the days u choose to leave without giving me an obvious hint? or izzit bcoz i ain observant enuff to be aware of ur condition? yes, i was too selfcentred to care abt myself n not mroe of u on that faithful day.. i could never forgive myself for that.. i sld have treated everyday equally serious as some things really cant wait.. n u really left me, without waiting for me to fulfill all my promises that i am really serious abt making them come true.. i will never forget how u were staring into the space when i was complaining abt those stuff that wasted my faithful day, but to react by looking at me wif ur pair of sparkling eyes, when i told u i can come home n change ur habitat into a mroe comfortable living envt tml, aft tml.. even if i happen to be going out, i will definitely change for u b4 going out.. u seemed to be replying me, saying thank you or u will look forward to tml's arrival..u looked at me when i told u that.. but never in 1000 yrs wld i expect u to be telling me instead, that u can't wait for that tml to come.. u had to leave me earlier.. y, y din i realise that.. no wonder u kept looking at me when i stood outside wif that notes n trying very hard to memorize.. are u telling me try my best n dun stress myself in future,take care of myself n muznt be sad, when u ain there for me to listen to my complains n worries.. y cldnt i sense it.. i really feeel like burning away all the papers so that i wld have nothing to read that day.. n i hadnt feed u that day, all i remembered was u scrabbling as usual into ur pink little cozy room. i told myself to give u more tissue as the weather is turing cold but i keep on forgetting.. i told myself that u wld be bitting n asking for food when ur food supply runs dry, esp when i had given u so much the day b4.. but it had nvr occured to me that u might be too weak to jump around like the days b4.. i failed to check on u2 every few hrs.. yet i was too panicky n concerned abt the day turning dark. y din i juz go n turn on the light n see that u2 are still fine b4 bathing? are u still swiming straight up? are u still having breath while sleeping at that time? i juz left straight for the bathroom n back to my study table.. y y y, y din i take a look at u2... i ain a good owner, even if i was for the past 3-4 yrs, i ain one on the last day, rit? i failed to check on how u are.. i failed to ensure that u had plenty of ur favourite food to be brought along wif u.. i failed to understand wat u are really trying to tell me.. i failed to look at u and really tell u how much i love u n how much u meant to me.. i failed to accompany u till ur last breath.. i failed to know when exactly u started leaving me.. i had taken things for granted n assumed lotz of tmls.. discovering u not being at ur usual hangout position is a terrible experience for me.. y did u juz leave me liddat.. y din u give me a change to say my last good bye, the last good nit, one last i love u n how much u meant to me....u noe, for a moment i thought u are playing a trick on me liek wat u used to do... but when i realised the fact that u are really not moving... how cld u leave without letting me know... a thousands n millions sldnt i be scared of ur body, a thousands n million time sldnt i fished u out but instead, carry u wif both of my bare hands, but i juz cldnt accept it at that moment.. the journey of sending u off seems too much for me to take.. so many things seemed to happen.. but i cant do anything to get u back.. u no longer have the strength to keep urself straight up.. i noe cld no longer get u back wif me.. but i juz cldnt accept the fact.. so many regrets n things i sldnt have done.. i really feel like smashing myself.. but i noe u want me to be happy n try my bez. i wanted to concentrate n do my bez, juz for u.. but never wldnt i expect that u had left not alone, but together wif her.. now that i understand how it feels like to be really scared, frighted, worried n to try to struggle n accept the 2nd fact.. i failed to noe again when u started leaving me.. to think of it, there is a high possibility that u2 left together.. i wasnt sure if it's possible that i will feel beta if i discover u the next day, but everyone noes we sldnt wait.. i dont wish for history to repeat itself, but i haven made it 100% possible. i really cant believe that u really din move when i did that to u. but i could have tried tickling u perhaps? i dunno, everything happened too fast for me to believe.. i hadnt be real aware of wat i am doing.. but i sld have at least cleared away the more dirty sawdust rit? but mummy says u liek it, then izzit a blessing in disgust to let me have a lesser regret? i hope to give u enuff warmth by holding u in my hands..u feel so light n soft as usual.. but wat is unusual is that tis is the first time u ain moving when i carried u.. y did u2 choose to leave me when i am so near to having all the time in the world to keep u accompany? yoyo, u had never told me that u actually dun detest xiaobai that much compared to how u show rit? i really hope u2 can be there for each other n be happy up there. i noe where she literally is, but where is he? i really have no idea. that decision seems so logical yet wavery at times. i have a thousand n zillions of regret for that faithful last day, will u forgive me? i wld never blame u for choosing that day to be the day, neither sld i blame u for leaving without letting me have a last look at u. coz it's juz my fault to be studying n not paying that much much much attention to u that day compared to how i used to.. the house is now so quiet n loney without u2. i have nobody to greet everyday even if when i wake up at 12pm or go to sleep at 2am. i can no longer hear those squeaking loud spinning of wheels different times of the day.. i no longer have a head of the house i wld account to abt where i will be going n say goodbye to when i leave the hse, n say welcome home the moment i step into the hse. i can no longer squart there silently yet having someone to know my existence n act pityful to gain more food for storage. i can no longer do a lot of things. many things have been lost in my daily life. u noe how cruel are u2 to leave me juz liddat, when i looking so forward to our reunion, yet u2 left juz liddat.. together.. but i noe it isnt ur fault, i juz have myself to blame.. i really hope that it is a jietuo for u.. i had learnt a lot of things from u2, n hope uall had a happy lifetime wif me. i had never regretted abt having uall into my life, thou ur lazy owner may sometimes feel nertargic abt changing that load of water or having to wash my hands juz to feed u at times, saying how naughty n mafan u are, but i don't mean it, u noe rit.. i wld never forget the happy times we had together n how cute n innocent u2 were n always will be... never ever will i regret having u wif me, n having u wif me...

2005-11-22T00:47:00.000+08:00

haha, a very happy day today...muz find somewhere to express my joy, cant be writing tis in my diary if not i will laugh at myself 5 yrs down the road.. =P yah, happy not coz i finished that crazy ms paper n dun take my econs paper 4 days ltr into consideration but coz i had lotz of entertainment from the tv today..watched 2 times of JIELUN's day at taipei, his autograph session.. omg, he signed continuously for 3hrs.. haiz, y dun he come to singapore... i will definitely go n queue, thou it will be more than 3 hrs. ain crazy but, juz wanna go.. then will sha siao haha.. but he is really funny, dun be blinded by his cool image. he is actually v funny de yeah.. haha funny.. thinked i missed lotz of his shows.. well, i shall wait for more hehe. so he can really brighten up my day man... ^-^

yah, happened to switch to a show teaching u how to buy jeans.. haha enriched lotz.. guess i have to do some changes to my wardrobe.. hehe well, is actually finding excuses to buy new one haha!! hmmm if only i can work for 4 weekends in dec.. that adds up to at least $280 haha!! *pray hard* but i will have to balance wif going out wif some peepz in weekends siah.. hmmm i need my scale.... haha alrdy planning my holi, where to go wif who etc haha looking forward man.. a break to change lotz of things too... =)

anw, tis site ain officially closed.. haha juz that the template is gone.. will do smt to it...soon.. haha..

2005-09-13T23:25:00.000+08:00

argh computer spoilt halfway while i was typing but luckily i saved half of my entry while typing, dun really trust internet explorer alrdy ah.. n thanks to our personalised "computer repair man", okay cannot so bad, thanks to uncle d, our computer got well in 10 mins.. oh man.. haha well, changed my blog template.. i oso dunno wat's the reason, juz feel liek changing ba.. simple layout rit, but damn bright haha. liek the mousie-ss!!! =P but juz cannot shift the tagboard further left so it wldnt clash wif the red "divider".. anyone who can help? haha.. thanks huh...

well, i practically dun have any mood to study, n it's so obvious coz i practically spent my whole day sitting in front of this computer (sunday afternoon).. nobody ask me out ma.. haha.. had a very fun saturday, but din go to anl's bday party coz was told abt 4c outing earlier.. so pai seh, like always nvr 赏脸, later they dun want call me already ah.. =Z but 不是我要的!! haiz y does things always clash one?!? i can be very free for 1 whole week without any activities but suddenly all things come in one day.. well, 有时候就是这么巧吧。。。 >>>

<<< was slacking the whole day watching tv, sleeping n sleeping.. bascially waiting for time to leave home.. my sis was telling me to get a life since it's holidays, sldnt be studying the whole of it rit? haha yeah, n i told her i am going out later at nit but relaz, class outing at marina only lah.. to think of it, i haven been to an official 4c outing for quite sometime! it's juz mini get-together among a few of us only leh.. so i am super excited till i nvr do anything haha.. but b4 it's time for me to prepare to get out, i was looking at xiaobai.. she was lying below the wheel, eyes half opened. seems to be shivering.. for a moment i was frightened. she usually closes her eyes totally when sleeping.. so i shouted her name, clapped, blew air.. all useless, she has no reaction to them... n i was really frightened.. my sis came n we took up the cage.. used tissue to tickle her, n still NO REACTION!!! at tat time, we are practically worried man.. then i tickle a few more times.. that naughty naughty xiaobai suddenly "stood up" n started running.. oh well... she knows how to pretend dead man!! *argh* really naughty ah.. hmm but tis makes me wonder y izzit always that one will really know how to cherish smt when he loses it.. haiz.. tis is quite saddening. i believe everyone knows tis but y does it still happen? i can't find an explanation.. but tis doesnt mean i dun cherish xiaobai k.. still play wif her everyday whenever i can one hor... but she is really more active nowadays, n her habit of making the wheel squeak at midnit is back! haha so happy that she is getting healthy again..

so prepared to go out to meet 4c for steamboat. the turnout was quite good. let's see: me belly peiying weiting miaoyue liyin limin fangting alex yongchang pak zhanxin zibin. as usual our latest wenxiang. n weijian appeared out of nowhere. argh, he din come for classouting one loh, he came to jio them to watch soccer one, that idiot.. still made a deal wif me to come, really COME loh.. nvr talk to him really, shall "force" him to go out out one day hakhak.. my bottomless-pit is never full, if not bcoz they wanna leave already, i guess i wld be cooking another plate of salmon man hehe=P we took mrt back to je, n had a chat wif them finally.. as usual it's full of funny lame jokes.. think we are very noisy arh.. but dun care la, 久久一次 la hehe. we reached je at rnd 11 n went to play pool. only 6 of us n wx din join us coz it's not very sensible for them to join us for only a while then take cab home.. really had lotx of fun hitting the coloured balls into the 6 holes using the white ball, esp wif those few of my best-est friends..=) n 我还在进步当中 haha.. need practices but dun always have chance to practice loh.. juz hope i wldnt deteriorate can already ah.. under that non-serious atmosphere, i actually had a serious talk wif pak abt ms, hmm made me wonder if i am really suitable for tis course but nvm, i shall observe further to confirm my decision n to give him beta advice.. i am a good senior k ;P n i finally won my 1st n last game.. had an enjoyable time.. really happy... *winkz* ^-^ but had to go home coz it's 12++++ already.. n further draggin at mac made me reach home at 1++.. haha such things is only permissible if i am in je loh.. haha but still had to get my dearest daddy down to wait for me =P >>> end of sat

hmm where got such great 爸爸?!? haha 有种说不出的感觉。。。but he is bad... so bad, dun want to cook for me.. bluf me that he is going to cook for me argh.. well... but i felt my love for him all of a sudden that sunday morning when i woke up n have yet to brush up, n heard someone coming in.. but when i realised it wasnt him, there was a sense of disappointment.. was quite shocking.. how come huh.. haha 不懂我在说什么了=P but u noe...

had a very fun time together wif my family yest nit. was slacking n din want to get back to my study table.. dunno y i took out my photo album n was lookin thru it.. haha i was really cmi last time man.. was soooo cute when i was b4 8 yrs old i think.. haha showed my album to my dad haha n he was really lookin at it.. then he point point point n say say say, then my mum was like leanin over n wanted to see too haha.. so funny.. then the whole family lookin at photos.. my sis took out hers n as usual laughters.. haah well..我深深地体验到家的温暖。。。好开心 ^-^ felt very glad to have a complete happy family.. thou every family has it's own prob, n i dun deny mine dun have, but i guess compared to many, i am already very fortunate..
有的人刚生小孩，又不懂是否应该继续原有的搬家、装修计划，因为丈夫可能又患上癌症。。。
有的人因为太多烦恼，想着患糖尿病的孩子以后是否能自力更生、能否应付种种开销，因此而失眠，仿佛得了犹豫症。。。
有的人要面对被裁的残酷厄运，又得承担重大的生活开销，因为他未婚的兄弟姐妹都得由他照顾。。。
我想我的烦恼、我家的困难，比起他们的，可算是微不足道吧。。。所以做人一定要学会知足，才会活得开心。

把每次恋爱当成最后一次。。。才会懂得付出。。。
把每次相遇当成最后一次。。。才会学着珍惜。。。

2005-09-11T14:44:00.000+08:00

woh, i haven been blogging for a long long long long time man.. haha time flies n amazingly, i have been thru my 1st 7 weeks of uni life. to think of it, it's realy quite funny. that first day of sch wifout knowing anyone in my sch, going to my first tutorial haha.. attraction between those alone peepz seems amusin all of a sudden. n they are the pple whom i hang around wif, 5 days a week. from not knowing anyone to seeing them almost every lecture or at the canteen.. haha.. my sch sldnt be that bad i guess. lecturers are better n content seems quite suitable? i hope so. n i guess that i wldnt be changing to another school in yr 2, to enjoy the great benefit of nice buffets occassionally n can make it lecturers. haha.. there is an amazing bond between people which i still find it most significant out of tis 7 weeks. friends, haha funny n most importantly, can click. local guys are older than us by 1\2\3 yrs, yet i can find those wif mentality younger than me haha. scholars are hardworking n clever, of which some are younger than us. n of coz some cmi cheena pple who spoils the imgage of their whole "gang". well, not neglecting those who are really nice n funny, eg those in my econs tutorial.. no shuai pple in my sch i can say, but occassionally some hope in engin.. *piew* well, i 看开already lah lolx.

School work: workload seems ok, wif very well planned timetable. however, i dunno y it seems to be endless work for me to catch up. 那些scholars哪里来这么多时间读书的?!?! but i shall pace myself that's the most impt ba. physics is still as fun, but the lecturer is really redundant. i love textbooks man.. maths is still okay at the moment. materials science is.. interesting? i dunno, haven been paying attention to it for the past 7 weeks. =P life science - killer. trying to convince myself that if i am comparable to those, i am really 厉害 la hor.. n expt really shows that i am stupid la: i study for 2.5 days, got only 26/40, pple study for 5 hrs, got 36/40.. well, i am stupid.. but i now how to score well now - study tutorials for 5 hrs can already!! lolx.. n i taking econs... well, i have no comments for it. juz that there are really quite a few new concepts that i really dun understand.. nevertheless, i shall enjoy studying these BA..? afterall, i am still studying science subjects rit..? unlike stupid management wif humour, muz admit it's really fun n interesting, but studyin for it makes me realise that i am reALLY a 100% science person...

自我安慰的功夫越来越了得了。。。。。。。哈哈

New friends: have been wif them for the past 7 weeks, still okay.. some really cant click, while come really can click lah.. but afterall, still not very 熟ma, so there is still a need to be careful in wat comes out of ur mouth. manytimes, thou i dont mean this, but i really scared they misintepret it as smt else.. haiz, so that is still some restriction to being 100% of myself.. time i guess..

however, i noticed some changes in myself.. i am getting noiser, amazing n dunno y... u noe, sometimes when i reflect on myself when i got back, i really think i am noisy.. hmm.. need some toning down at times i guess.. but think i ain so shy when meeting strangers already.. that's a good change i guess.. the reason behind it i dunno.. maybe coz i happy, 心情好? haha i dunno lah.. but it's always good to change for the better, to the extend that it isn't "overboard" rit.. haha hope i ain like a xiao zha bor man.. hehe

或许是与新朋友的长期接触，使我更加珍惜过去的那段时光，更加怀念老朋友吧。。。不可否认的是，与旧buddies在一起时真的真的、真的很开心，很轻松，很‘自己’。。。=) 真心希望那份友谊可以永远不变质，永远的那么真实。。。

look forward to those meetings n outings n gatherings... (",)

2005-08-05T13:14:00.000+08:00

heyz, long time no blog... 1stly, pic of my 2 cutiest family members taken wif my new phone haha..

mr yoyo, aka, new head of the family. keeps looking at the door direction until all 4 of us came home. he will then look inside the hse, sometimes at the mei nus on tv... haha!!!

miss xiao bai, thinking that she is a ninjah turtle huh...

well, as for me, i am troubled wif electives n stuffs...... hope my best plan can work... dun intend to take minor... hope that i can improve my core subjects in that way..... hope that it will really work tis way ah.. but pple say minors are ez to score, coz u juz need to pass.. haiz... *FAn*

timetable looks slack, it really allows me to go out n still have time to read up aft lec n do tut... maybe juz bcoz i haven started 2 of the tutorials...? ut at tis pace, i can really take one more elective rit? haiz... indecisive person trying v hard to make decisions... but no matter wat, i decided not to drop my phy n maths, so i MUZ really use them to push up my average points!! (i hope i can fulfill that...) yah... decision now can affect the future, so they mux be carefully planned.. but i am planning everything by myself.. sometimes i really home my parents can help me share my troubles but everytime when i have the urgh to tell them abt it, i felt that it's even mroe troublesome to explain wat it's all abt, so i din in the end... haiz... time is nearing n i have until tonit 10pm to decide my fate for tis sem, n indirectly, for next 4 yrs... juz hope that my decision is a wise one... *wish me luck*

anw, applauses for the superstar results.. it's progressing correctly, n my predictions are correct... top 3 out, n i can predict the 3rd for both girls n boys... but the fight btw 1st n 2nd is tight... more for the guys i guess.. while it's slightly more obvious for the girls i think.... hehe...

n yah, my sis's article is out on tis week's i weekly!!!! yesh, she wrote that article.. haha, go look for her name ba... =P think she wld be framing it man... afterall it's really a rare chance for wat u wrote or did to be published in such a high profile magazine...

i miss slacking life, n those days shopping at orchard rd on week days... oh man... but i am adjusting... juz dun wish to lose some friends coz we dun have the chance to see each other, unlike in the past..... very sadly, i think it happened to some of them.....i have done my part already, well... both parties are partially at fault i think, juz that i am the disappointed party....

2005-07-24T13:30:00.000+08:00

went for engin orientation talk on fri, wif someone from nj but i dunno her.. so paiseh to recognize the wrong person at the mrt station haha.. but luckily we 2 clicked off quite well, v glad.. haven been sitting there listening to pple talk for quite a long long long time.. but i was actually more hungry than sian.. had been eating a lot since pck n have becomed a pig... cant sit thru without feeling hungry already how how.. no wonder i get skinny when sching haha..

met ex-njcians frm bioengin.. one of them actually dunno i was from nj.. omg.. did i change so much? or i was too skinny to be noticed? haha..anw, she was actually the girl before me when i went to the bca int.. n she cant accept the fact that i was actually that girl there... hmmm, or maybe it's her prob alrdy? haha.. v nice of endra to fetch me from where i was to where i am supposed to go.. spent my afternoon wif a new friend, n saw some of my future schmates or maybe tutorialmates.. finally opened myself to learn more abt AUs, minors, etc... haiz.. finally got my timetable n my tut gp when i got home.. sian, i really dunno who will be in my tut gp.. hope n pray that there wldnt be a lot of scholars ah.. can die man.. wld rather be striving in envt being the crop of the bottom than be the bottom of the crop.. juz dun like... hope that i wldnt be self-consolating myself that i dun need to volunteer myself in classes coz the scholars will do that.. haizz...

timetable for tis sem is really qte slack.. made me wonder if i sld start my minor/electives tis sem.. but have been weighing the pros n cons n no conclusion made.. haiz.. but anw, bought a new phone on sat... traded in my PANASONIC X400... very very extremely bu she de that nice nice white colour slim n light phone.. but i really scared of it hanging or wat in future.. it's worth $100.. meaning it's in a perfect condition yest... i bought it for $138.. so like $38 dollars for usingit for 7mths? haha.. but still, i wldnt forget the phone.. damn slim n nice..

haiz computer has problem again.. i need to solve them soon.. n i cant get on to msn.. sianz..

put aeroplane

2005-07-17T00:59:00.000+08:00

pple, stop putting me aeroplane.. am i of such low importance to uall? well, nvr put too high hopes on anything n everything.. haiz... staying at home is sianz.. but i wldnt want sch to reopen either.. damn sian.. scared of school... dun want.. pple rnd me seems to be busy wif their own things, n dun have time for me.. am i the only free one ard? haiz.. that's v saddening... maybe the only thing to cheer myself up is......

weijian from project superstar is my cousin's pri sch classmate cum neighbour!!! haha.. he lives at the same block as my cousin leh!!! u noe, there loh.. haha really hope he can get into semifinals coz he has the bez vocals among the 4 of them... we all will support him one.. but sadly, haiz.. he is attached.. sobz sobz haha nvm, at least i noe how i can take pic wif him in future lolx

stupid quek weibin had a new way of not listening to me talk.. pick up phone, say hello hello hello, but tis time, nvr hang up.. let me listen to his surroundings.. then listen to me say hello like an idiot rit? want me to hang up? no,i wldnt.. end up he still hung up.. stupid childish idiot.....

hmmm looking for a phone to buy.. 7610? 7270? k700i? any recommendations? dun tell me 8800... nan de had a talk wif sl thru msn.. n found out that i can get $50 starhub voucher wif those hubber points.. compensation for not being to play pool n eat prata feast? haiz.. nvm... shant brood over that.. yah, n had a chat wif my ntu senior... haha, they had their grad yest, fri, the day i got lost in ntu.. haiz.. if only i have his phone number n maybe can call him to ask him save me? ying xiong jiu mei rit? haha.. think too much =X *knock knock, wake up* but nice chatting.. =D n at least i noe how my gown looks liek 4 yrs down the road huh... =P

*smILEs ^_^

2005-07-16T01:54:00.000+08:00

sianz, i am hungry now.. haiz, cant get out for supper tonit.. ='( hope dinner tml will be delicious haha.. anw, went ntu today.. the adventure of a little mouse in big maze..

ok, i practically got lost inside.. i muz really admit that my sense of direction sucks... but the pple there isnt v gd at directing me either.. or maybe i sld not alight at that busstop in the first place.. maps ain reliable, thou it seems short, it's actually a much longer distance, esp in maze.. at last i managed to conquer my way to the stupid student service centre... maybe i sld console myself that at least i have found the shortest way to ssc: the long-long-"slope-y"-neverending-stupid covered-walkway, which made my knee hurts again.. haven got such feeling since mid j2.. somemore it rains *argh + ouch* the whole world is good at redirecting.. it's normal wif phone call enquries.. but it's bad when tis happens in a building itself. from L6, i went to L5 n L1 then L2... great. when i reached there, a pool of overseas scholars are doing their dunno wat stuff.. bez. u mean i have to wait for all of them juz to ask a question? nono, so i went off aft stayin for 5 mins wif the pissed face.. so i still haven got the ans to my qns, but i managed to get the endorsement.. sld i say it's qte a fulfilling hike?? ......

i thot i have to climb up another hill to my next destination, but i waded there instead.. $45 isnt that easy to get.. so avoid going back nj when it's pouring.. -_-''' no breadtalk for the juniors coz the queue is too long.. it's v suei that they pian pian practicing tek's song.. watthe.. of all songs, of all time.. haiz.. nvm juz sat there.. the yun luo has plates hugh enuff to block my view of him but to leave some for me to see the conductor.. mr lum was conducting.. i actually drifted off halfway thru the song, not coz of the music of coz haha.. but looking at the conductor, i thought of those rvco days.. when mrlum was conducting us n training us..concerts, syfs.. his expectation for music.. the details.. his yao qiu.. those bits n pieces.. it's hard to describe.. u mus feel n experience it urself.. hmmmm.... juniors muz jiayou, maybe going back next week.. thou i dun dare to try playing there coz i have rusted already, but i will make sure i use sandpaper n polish myself soon haha.. will make sure i "forget to turn up for aurora" haha =P

anyone wants to buy:
1. GP tys (a levels)
2. Econs Textbook (brand new)
3. yang qin (of sentimental value)

yup, decided to do some cleaning up of my qin n try to sell it.. it's really yi yi bu she, those days- i really practiced wif it, played it, enjoyed myself n played it as a hobby.. but i think i sldnt let it stay in hse.. it can be improvised, then have a beta future when it goes outside.. i tell u, it's ying se is qte nice k!! but even if i cont playing it in future, it is half-condemed now.. coz the nuts rusted, it's my stupid hand's prob.. booohoooo ='( but couldnt juz watch it "die" in my apartment without seeking for a doc rit.. haiz dunno wat i am talking alrdy.. beta find a buyer if not u can still find it in my hse 10yrs down the road, coz i've change my mind not to sell it ah.........

i'll be wif u

2005-07-14T00:47:00.000+08:00

well, had cleared my mind n thots when changing water for yoyo, he is really a fish wif ling2xing4.. haha, so cute...*~cuTe~* ^_^ but i juz dun understand how he manage to make the whole tank sooooo dirty by juz "sitting" there the whole day.. hmmm.. anw, felt soooo much beta wif a clear mind... human beings tend to be impulsive.. or izzit juz me? haha. at that point of time, things juz seem so bad.. but it's actually me who is thinking too much n making things more complicated rit? sldnt think so much at the wrong time, but think more at the correct time ok mingyong? haha tis song's lyrics is very very meaningful.. overheard it on radio when changing water n really enlightened me... listen:

~往往快乐就在你我的眼前, 却因为悲观什么都看不见
~幸福并不是只会存在一瞬间抬起头来不要再自我可怜
~你要发现生命的珍贵...或许我想得太多让自己好累
~放行自己才能追寻你的梦

very meaningful n appropriate.. happiness is usually by our side, but we din cherish it bcoz we are (i am in fact..) too pessimistic.. (there sld be a more appropriate word rit?) or maybe coz we (I) think too much n made ourselves too tired n sad? sld really cherish the wonders of life.. so live life to the fullest =) stop thinkin n brooding over the sad n unhappy things. dont make urself unhappy from now onwards... heez *wiNks

so the lyrics of the song, I'll be with you - Tension

I'll be with you, yeah...　whenever you go朋友

往往快乐就在你我的眼前却因为悲观什么都看不见

幸福并不是只会存在一瞬间抬起头来不要再自我可怜

你要发现生命的珍贵 Everything is coming your way

或许我想得太多让自己好累
就怕这个不对那个不对做的不对爱的不对失去了信心面对

你给我力量点燃心中的希望 Remember
I'll be with you You'll be with me
伸出你双手我就随时会出现 You know
I'll be with you You'll be with me

心里的梦想都在你眼前出现在你梦想出现

爱它一直存在你的生命中不要因为害怕心里只有痛

重担交给我不要压力这么重放行自己才能追寻你的梦

终于明白曾经失去什么我的爱不再沉没听见你呼唤我
Hey! I'll be there 4u brother & u'll b there 4me
我将会记住这份友情永远不会忘记
So count on me 每当你需要我的精神鼓励

N put ur trust in me bcoz u gonna believe tat I'll b with u
陪你渡过大风大浪
Don't worry about a thing 提起脚步一道踏上
这段路旅途有起有落有快乐有悲伤

提起你的胸膛跟我们共同追逐梦想

每一天每一夜每一分钟每一秒 I'll b watching over u
Say the words 我随时就会出现在你身边

Standing-by ur side

sianz

2005-07-13T17:13:00.000+08:00

go to view. encoding. select unicode (UTF-8)

nvr go surfing the net if u have got nothing beta to do...
don't u stumble across stuffs tat make u 不知所措。。。
stuffs can make ur peaceful life upside down,
stuffs can make u someone else...
u thought u have understood things to the fullest,
convinced urself that things are supposed to be liddat,
things will become tis n that..
wif a new beginning.. a new mindset..
but never did u expect...
n now u wonder if things can really be wat u thought...
tis seems to screw up wat u have settled wif urself,
n even the ever-correct decision seems to start wavering wif the wind...
事情是否真如你所想像的那样？
时间仿佛和你开了一个大玩笑。。。
你是否还可以当着什么都没发生过、什么都没看到？
依旧朝着你所希望的方向走、达到你所盼望的结局？

energy concert

2005-07-11T00:32:00.000+08:00

interestin saturday..
sis smsed me saying tat there's a brown bunny hiding behind a green dustbin at opps block.. great imagination: carried it home. kept it in some "container". it hopped around the whole hse n on my bed etc etc.. think too much already. it already disappeared when i went down 1hr later.. well, i shall adpot some other time..

had lunch wif my another 7 yrs friend... city area is v safe coz it's full of police yest.. i am so scared.. lolx.. came to realise that woh, time flies.. i have known my sec1 classmates for the 7th yr already.. my sec3 peepz, 5th yr already... eeeeeeeeeee, so er-xin.. lolx.. my pri sch peepz?dun say already.. hahah, but know them for so long so wat? some pple come n go.. some left deep memories in ur heart.. some are still living inside.. to think of it, i had some real good friends, but we haven been talkin for dunno how long.. is tis real friendship? if it is, how come it cant weather such feng feng yu yu? talking nonsense already.. but seriously, its really quite saddening that we dun make a point to remember n keep in contact wif each other after meeting new friends n getting into a new envt. new circle of friends, forgot abt the old. zhong se qing you, pang seh the old.. well, is tis inevitable? hmm... i can foresee.. tsk tsk.. but oso maybe bcoz we were still young that time to cherish n know wat to do to maintain that "buddyness"..? kk, crap.. but i can still foresee... haiz

walked the chinese garden-home routh 4 times in less than 8 hrs.. saw the red colour toyota trueno parked there.. uncle-d said that there are 2 "AE68" in ntu.. hhah, i really wonder who owns them n drives them huh.. hehheh (",) my sis n i rushed here n there, then collected tix from hl. was late,so paiseh.. thanks girl, but kfc is qte unhealthy leh.. haha..=P stupid ndp made the whole beach road n blah blah blah road JAM N JAM N JAM!!! was 50 mins late for ENERGY's concert.. but not too sad, coz its not jielun.. wahaha.. watched fireworks on bus 16 in a traffic jam, interesting huh? the whole bus practically "jerked" even thou it's not moving. but even if it moves, it is juz crawling. so it finally crawled to indoor after 45 mins.. but luckily we were late..coz our complimentry tix = balcany seats were upgraded so we sat at a much beta place wif a much beta view somewhere in the middle.. thx stupid py.. ha
nice concert! n i wldnt say that it's lousy, unlike some pple who wld definitely criticize the concert.. hmm.. ah-di can sing.. nu-nai can dance..sld have brought lightsticks from home.. really quite sad that they are parting.. energy rocks the indoor that nit.. 4 funny n humorous guys.. i wldnt forget them.. hope that there will be a day they can perform together again.. ENERGY really have energy..

supper at lao pa sat was "enriching". i "enriched" my stomach wif a big bowl of clever fish, which cheated the mi-fen, n my fav strawberry kisses, all by myself. i am a pig.. haha.. saw shen xiang long who likes picking up ba-zang.. haha!! but he looks gayish man...eee.. extreme skinny. he was wif leon, the guy who dropped into the revival round last week. muz be asking sly for tips, tsk tsk, got exposed by me lolx.. but y sly? hmmm.. or maybe they are wif a group of them? coz they ordered a BIG plate of roti prata lookalike thing.. is weijian there too? wahaha.. tall tall huang bi ren came next.. real tall n cool.. she had popiah craving yest haha.. great view from my table.. in the middle of firming i guess.. met long time no see senior aihui oso.. getting more n more pretty again..haha.. she havin small gathering at 12+am i guess, nice idea..

but my dad wldnt buy that idea.. he was complaining n complaining.. luckily nr5 did come n brought the 3 of us home. in future, dun be so good n ask ur dad out for supper. 1stly, its bad for his health.. liek v bad daughter to ask him eat so late at nit, rit rit? 2ndly, he may not let u out, to that place, at that time in future, coz he will think that it's v hard to get home when it's actually quite ez.. juz my speculation.. *touch wood* hope it wldnt come true.....

2005-07-08T16:32:00.000+08:00

hmmm.. went to the syf chinese orchestra presentation yest.. went to support nj n nvr expect that rv was oso performing.. haha, so my $3 is worth back even more.. =P <- lousy sentence but anw, met lotz of pple there, unexpectedly.. n so coincidentally, i juz "read" abt them the day b4 yest...

i was clearing the drawer for my mum.. all my diaries from p6 till now are all inside.. so i opened one by one n was reading n reading.. memories.. everything.. time seems to fly back to years ago.. friends.. fun.. stupid actions.. chidish mentality.. haha.. but it is indeed fun to read them.. interesting.. n i have decided that if i sld die soon, my diaries shall be buried or burnt wif me man, no one shall read.. if not i will haunt u.. lolx.. =P

so there was 2 of them that are more distinct.. i ain too close wif them.. but read them in 2 different enteries.. different pple.. smt abt them.. n it's only upon readin the entries that i remember abt them.. so they left memories wif me once again.. yah... hmm.. n i happened to see the two of them.. well, juz so qiao.. hmm, guessed that i was able to handle meeting them better than b4.. =) juz too qiao man..

well, i juz ain too good at knowing wat i am actually thinking.. ain mature enuff i guess.. will i actually be able to do wat i want? i hope so.. time will tell me the answer...

collected my revived panasonic x400.. n i actually asked the best connection girl when i was checking: everything inside is gone izzit? yah... everything gone.. the proof of my victorious battle at shaw hse when jielun came was all gone.. the cute posed pic of xiaobai which i showed everyone is oso gone.. my ringtones which i spent $ downloading are gone.. my yi qian nian yi hou ringtone isnt one mth old yet.. all gone.. haiz.. now i learnt that i sld really send all nice pics to someone else as backup.. hope friend ah, u nvr delete xiao bai's pic.. by hook or by crook i muz get hold of that pic.. coz xiaobai dun want to pose already.. i tried taking juz now.. ='( hmm.. n i saw that small bai wei xiu yest, the drop out from project superstar last week.. hmm another pretty girl.. arhhh... project superstar...... my weijian (not that monkey daddy... haha), y u nvr get into the semi finals!! aiyoh... revival round? hmmm, nvm get to see more of u ah? lolx.. he really sing well so i think really can make it thru the revival rit? everyone is so supportive of him.. touching messages at the forum.. n he even has a fan club already!! li hai man.. hmmm, pple sld stop blaming the one who got in, they said thatjason got in coz he paid to call himself etc.. well, put urself in his shoes n it doesnt feel good to be criticized by pple rit.. good luck weijian.. hmm, good thing that my junyang got thru *applause* haha.. y is he at nus but not ntu.. sobz.. but i think he lives in the west haha!! (okay, enuff hua-chi-ness.. haha) great voice, wj n jy.. hope both of them will be fightin eventually for the title.. (",)

days passed n i haven really done anything constructive.. was clearing n cleaning n mopping etc.. is this how i am going to spend my last few weeks of holidays? hmmm... busy till i haven been coming here to type.. well, when will i really go n register for the classes? will the small bday gathering i will be organizing be successful? dun think i will be going to msia wif lx etc already.. ecp when will i blade on ur ground? will i be successful at getting back the money from stupid quekweibin before sch reopens?? wx have been askin me to go cheena black every week haiz.. when will i get to go? nvr go for the 4c girls gatherin/clubbin on ladies nit either. hmm.. well.. think i will miss this "onceinalifetime" chance of entering cb foc today.. wasted.. haiz.. for ur info, they celebratin 2nd anniversary so free entry today accoring to wx..? well...

so i come here to add music to my blog as consolation? haha.. well, jx i pian pian want to put music leh.. haha.. =P to all who finds music or any sound at blogs irritatin, juz press the stop button when the blog finish loading n the music will stop.. n u can read like normal. music cross all boundaries, music heals ur soul, music can do wonders.. well, i am a music loveer... hmmm, when will my all my tis n that skills improve? hc is good.. tis song is nice to sing.. put tis song here as a sign of support for wj too.. haha =P "listen out" for more..
n energy, wait for me tml nit.. *wiNks

2005-06-30T11:19:00.000+08:00

haha, can u believe it, ming yong actually cooked dinners for 2 days!! yeah, cook for my family to eat, made a mess of the kitchen... lolx.. but its juz xin xue lai cao i think.. finally made some contributions to the family huh, lolx.. well, i mux admit its quite fun la.. somesort have a flar for cooking leh? haha..afterall nobody helped me ma.. occasionally ran out to the living room to ask a few qns wif the pot in my hand haha!! but being the daughter of my dad for 18++ years, i seriously thinks that he finds my cooking like shit.. haha =X or maybe i sld say he has high expectation of food.. only some food outside n my mum's cooking can pass the test? hmmm.. he seems to be eatin till v tong ku leh.. ='( my mum of coz finds it ok coz someone is there to cook wat!!! my sis is being fed to the fullest, coz i cooked all she likes....

Horrifying Dinner No. 1 (tuesday):

12 fried chicken nuggets (heyz, my 1st time frying?? things n guess wat, its chinese i.e. golden brown k.. not black... for ur pt of info, i ain being racist, juz kidding yeah?)

1 normal hotdog n 2 cheese hotdogs, ham"s".. (i can "jian" leh)

campbell soup - wild mushroom favour (i am an expert already.. lolx)

OMeLeTtE!!! haha, ham n cheese omelette!! - 4 eggs in total i.e. 1 per person.. one cant eat too much egg per day u noe.. (to all nj-cians, i have mastered the omelette our western food uncle cooks.. thou mine is not as soft inside, BUT now i noe cant cook it for too long n it will be perfect! wahahaha.. =P)

3 fried bread - mistake.. (its pratically soaking the bread in oil!!! UNHEALTHY N -_-"'... stupid me to really listen to my dad.. well, i threw away 1.5 fried bread in the end.. its better to waste than to be sooooo extremely unhealthy... )

2 friendly tomatos... (the most healthy thing on the dinning table... ) plain bread wif margarine n cheese for ur own enjoyment.. haha

almost 1/2 of an EXTREMELY BIGGGGG watermelon.. heavenly...

so i stayed in the kitchen for 3hr 15 mins..... cook wash cut n mop... sense of acheivement neh.. haha

Horrifying Dinner No. 2 (wednesday):

meat + mushroom + ham + spaghetti sause + spaghetti... haha, mistakes: nvr add dunno wat flour to the meat, hence its HaRd; nvr add marinate the meat, no taste, only tomato taste..; something wrong wif the mixing of the sause, i dunno wat's wrong.. haha not bad lah.. still can eat.. wif the rescue of my sis.. lolx!! =P

well, think my dad gave up on me n had his dinner outside on day 2... =X

pics of pck

2005-06-28T18:11:00.000+08:00

n since i hav juz learnt how to upload pic, i shall upload some from pck the musical.. these photos are from belly's camura.. thou i am quite slow n backdated at uploading pics hehe.. shall leave the da pai for later.. n yesh, i am STILL waitin for uncle desmond n adeline to upload n send the rest... *HINT HINT HINT...* =P

joanne pei... soooooo beautiful n soooo friendly.. my ntu senior! haha (i looked so ugly n weird.. ahhhh)

Jamie teo, another mei nu.. but i realised my eyes ain really thhaaat small rit? haha

adeline!! look, look look, look at the background.. monkeys everywhere.. lolx

me fang belly n the "honey" gang.. the gang "always stick together" man ~quoted from the script haha

3 of us wif the 2 "old pple" haha.. eh, juz older volunters lah haha.. west bus peepz rox, but not the bus uncle.....

2005-06-28T17:17:00.000+08:00

hmmm wat does a friend mean to u?? wat does a good friend mean to u?? how much does that friend mean to u? will one prefer his old friends or will one prefer his new friends..? quite disappointed at wat happened yest... well, maybe i think too much.. maybe there is no hidden meanin... think of the enjoyable times yah.. n maybe my sis is really right...

wj msged to ask me buy tix for fri to watch initial d.. after being put aeroplane by them on sat, i was of coz v scared.. replied to him that they are not thrustworthy pple.. haha but i dun really mean it la, muz say if not they always bully me... they are still my buddies.. at least i am v sure that they wldnt do what happened to me yest to me... thou they are extremely zhong se qing you, haha.. but juz wldnt, i dunno how to explain.. juz different.. but for the time being, i juz hoped that stupid wx can be more responsible n reply faster... *a~bish*

went to fly entertainment yest for some stupid briefing.. actually, it's juz a stupid meetin n i concluded that the main purpose is to get our ic to make passes thats all... still have to wait for email n so i still dunno wat i am doin on thurs.. but liek distributing gifts or ushers or wat? i dunno... ah, i noe, for opening of big safe, used to be called safe super store.. haha.. n i noe that i have to wear all black, so i believe i can juz disappear n belly cannot find me.. haha.. went to orchard to meet my sis.. this is the case everytime without fail: reached taka; toilet beside kino; met her face to face.. either while we are walking, one in one out, or one washin hands n saw the other when lookin in the mirror.. haha.. juz so qiao.. without fail.. so we concluded that shall be out meetin place man... dun need set time oso!! lolx...

shop n shop.. i controlled n nvr buy anything wahahaha.. *victory* lolx.. i mean nvr anyhow buy things.. thou i eyed something"S".. ='( money, please drop from the sky... haha.. n amazingly we managed to dig some good stuff from mango yest!! its been days since the official start of mango sale.. not bad rit? haha.. even the lady behind me when paying asked me where did we got our top.. n she went to dig for it after that haha =P so, i am afterall not so much of a spendthrift (n i stil think that tis word contradicts itself..) rit rit rit? i buy xpensive stuff only when its on sale, n nvr anyhow grab anything i see wat.. i think abt it ma.. i consider a lot leh.. haha, kk enuff... i paid for the "newspaper bill" when the uncle came k.. haha

hope that sally hansen no chip thing works..

my family...

2005-06-27T10:59:00.000+08:00

happened to be looking for a display pic for msn.. think it is newly dled so my pic is gone... n when i was looking for nice pics of xiao bai, i happened to see tis pic.. our family photo taken last new year!! year 2004... suddenly feel the warmth.. haha.. thou not everyone is in pic leh.. my 2nd yi zhang took tis pic if i nvr analyze wrongly haha.. n a lot not here at that point of time.. yeah, my hse haha.. especially nowadays, i happened to be meeting a lot of my relatives from my mum's side... all these pple in the pic haha.. n my 3rd aunt juz gave birth to a cousin, so he is 18 ++ yrs younger than me.. that's usually the case for my nephews n nieces leh.. hmmm.. young cousin, sure get pampered by everyone tis side.. haha..
so do family members get together only when there is problem? honestly, i dun think we meet so often if nothing special.. its usually once during new yr or twice a year.. tsk tsk, tis sldnt be the case.. muz meet more often... n keep in deeper contact... afterall, we are descendents of our grandpa n grandma so we sld more or less be united or bonded in one way or another rit... genes is an amazing thing... i may reaLLy end up learning dancing wif my cousin n aunty... haha (",)

wat a day....

2005-06-25T00:10:00.000+08:00

hmmm, yest (23rd June) went orchard, hoping to see jielun.. hehe, dun say i crazy or wu liao leh...everytime he comes to spore will go heeren one ma, so muz go try my luck.. haha, hope to pei my husband shop ma... lolx.. but ended up without any shou huo.... no jielun but met so many 4c pple.. yong chang was limping at taka wif her gf.. ming ming saw me n walked away pretend huh, lolx.. sld scold him more when he called belly to "act innocent" haha.. jian ping can actually recognize us huh.. or i sld say i can still recognize him.. someone so familar looking standing there... me n fang practically "jumped" away n discussed if thats really him... y they so paiseh to see him, wif his gf leh? haha.. me most friendly liao, waved to them haha.. classmate for 1 yr, nvr talk, but feel qte happy he still recognize me n them huh.. haha n lixin was at john little, so qiao she was there when we happened to stop by to try some famous amos cookie.. think we stood there to talk for more than half an hr... msia trip to her hse? muz be successful ah, sounds exciting n interesting.. muz seek permission first as usual, haiz... so short a day, we met so many pple from 4c... lets have a 4c gathering ba! haha.. soon i will make it a point to make it successful... n ya, i grew a little bit fatter!!! my arms... ahaha.. so happy... clever wx to notice it on tues already huh, lolx.. of coz "s'he gave birth to me one ma.. lolx

haha, today went kbox!! so shoik.. we stayed there for extra 45 min.. hehe.. then went home to be pt hse wife... I PROMISE TO STOP BUYING SHOES!!! i really went to count.. i muz admit i have the most shoes at home.. hehe =P when ironing, i stock "took" my assets, my clothes... I SLD NOT BUY ANYMORE SIMILAR CLOTHES!! give myself allowance for jeans only... SAVE MONEY k... oso, i muz HAVE HEALTHY LIFESTYLE!!!! young pple can juz faint n die of heart attack.. 2 in 2 consecutive days.. scary ah.. n wif my family history which consists of heart attack, cancer, hypertension etc... *touch wood* i seriously think i ain healthy... shall cut down on potato chips first.. they cause pimples too!! haah n fast food.. glad that i dun have craving for mac already hoho.. n dunno y, after charging my phone for like 3 hrs since it switched off itself coz of low bat.. it cant on now... wake up ah!! can die without phone man.. anyoone wif spare phone pls lend me, for 2 weeks only, when i send my phone for servicing.. stupid best connection, nvr provide spare phone.. they think that everyone is so reach to have extra phones at home.. haiz..

n off to send xiao bai to see "vet" tml... poor hamster...

JIE LUN!!!

2005-06-24T18:48:00.000+08:00

21st June 2005

haha, today is a very special day... today, my jielun is coming to town!!! hehe... yeah!! hoping to see him, i dragged wx to shaw hse... "normal" pple like fang n belly wldnt pei me do such things one... hehe, lucky still got hyena mummy to pei me.. yeah!! left from hospi to orchard.. yeah, she is much beta today.. luckily.. this makes me more fang xin n less guilty to go see my husband man.. hehe.. well, we reached shaw like 6.40.. of coz there is already a big crowd along the red cARpet.. but we are like still at the 3rd row, unexpectedly.. actually, went there expecting to see only heads but that's not the case ah.. hehe.. gd gd.. on top of that, wx that guy spotted a better spot right opposite where we were standing.. so we migrated to the opposite. that's a very good move.. thou its still 3rd row, but much much nearer!! no pillar to further the distance btw me n my husband... hehe.. if we nvr move, we wld be at least 4m apart.. now, we can be juz less than 1m away from each other!! haha.. =D no, this time isnt coz i am sitting at the first row of cinema k!! haha =) waited n waited, we started chatting to spend time.. practiced my shotting skills by taking xian za ren who walked down the carpet.. n when edison came, the camura switched off the moment i snapped.. how can how can!! angry...

I WANT TO BUY MY OWN DIGI CAMURA!!!

luckily still got my panasonic x400, chao bai chao you xin phone... thou it doesnt have a good camura, its still beta than nothing.. wx took the head of edison wif it.. thou they said that his attitude isnt v good, but he is the only one who signed for his fansi along the carpet, at least thats what i see.. oso snapped artistic photos of shawn yue, anthony wong, ah bee.. wong walked the slowest, so photo is the clearest... issit bcoz young pple walk faster?!? hehe.. but haiz... when is my jielun coming to see me? haha.. u noe, the AE 86 was on orchard road too!! soo coooolll.... it was now inside my phone, but looked liek a normal white car... ='( it wld be a diff story wif a digi cam.. stupid me, sld have used the camura wif little bat life ma.. ah... it stopped there coz of the traffic light, such a good chance man... *dui* but at least i saw it moving wif my own eyes..

then liek 7.45... screams n screams... of coz my jielun is here... he walked n smiled!! haha.. so near me!!!! but realy stupid of me to try taking photo... my skils ain good, i sld noe that rit.. wat for go n take photo... sld really stare at him ma.. maybe he will smile to me lah!! instead of wx... i wldnt forgive him one.. yesh, i am refering to wx... ah.... KILL ME!!! split second n he passed me... hehe, he looked real good, juz the same as how he looked on photo... hehe, soooooo cool, soooo diao... haha.. =P but jielun really different.. the moment he walked passed each side, the pple will be dashing towards the stage, juz like the whole crowd move wif him.. yah, whole crowd moved wif him... poor me n wx are practically STUCK in the crowd.. much MuCH much worst than the 2 hrs along the red carpet... but i cant catch a glimpse of him on stage.. juz listened to his voice n can melt already.. soon he got down the stage n we thot show over.. can go mac get a drink.. *pieow... no crowd? so we walked n walked, n realised we are heading towards the wrong direction.. ah... n when we walked pass the door of isetan, the escalators are empty n JIELUN IS TAKING THE ESCALATOR up!!! ahah, he waved to us below n everywhere... haha!!! so i watched him get up 2 flights of escalator.. luckily the isetan is quite "glass-y".. how luckily are the shoppers who happened to be shopping at isetan at that moment man... =') but i am contented already... learned to be clever n dun take photo, juz see can already.. super happy... but i still wldnt forgive wx, jielun smiled at him..................................

crazy...

2005-06-23T00:30:00.000+08:00

so i had a "talk" myself.. 4 lines by myself.. hope i ain actin like a crazy girl... seem so stupid... haiz.. wat happened man.. ahhhh... hope i din throw my own face.. but now i noe smt, hehe.. =P maybe playin games rit, haha.. self consolation... crazy again...

well, wat happened to everyone? everybody seems so moody... hmmm..... am i easily contented wif my own imagination at the time being and wasnt thinking abt the bad things, but not the rest so they ain feelin happy? one thing for sure, one can be made unhappy by one's own imagination too, aka, think too much... will get over this after that period rit? well, dun think too much n let ur brain rest after a day... hope everybody will be feelin better after a good nit's sleep...

meanwhile tis crazy girl hopes to have a sweet dream =P n now that i noe, i shall anticipate the arrival of tml nit... hehe ^-^ *smiles* ^-^

the last memorable day.....

2005-06-22T11:27:00.000+08:00

well, 20th June 2005, the last day at PCK the musical... to think abt it, time really flies... the first day we joined was actually 30th May 2005.. n unknowingly i have spent dunno how many days there.. actually, i sld be v happy that its over, i can spend all my time doing wat i want, i can slack at home etc etc.. lotx of free time, but i ain totally happy......... hmmm....

have to reach indoor earlier than normal, so no choice but to leave earlier... i am actually v worried for her.. she is suddenly so weak n vunerable.. the way she look, the way she sound n react when the doc was trying to get some blood samples... it really made v sad n feel like crying... i am scared... upon 3rd attempt, he managed to got the fresh red blood from her... poor thing... really bu fang xin.. but no choice, i gave my word n have to leave for indoor... (smt out of point, this new doc is qte shuai leh! but he is short... hmmm... nvm, contented to be his part time nurse.. haha)

thou i seem hyper, i am actually v worried deep down.......

belly n i reached indoor armed wif our dinner, dinner which made others jealous, haha... i spotted a cart, those kind wif an umbrella wif "hagan daze" printed on it.. i dunno how to spell, nvr take note of xpensive icecreams.. when i tried opening it, its EMPTY!?!! okay, false alarm.. ltr yen miin came n shouted, the ice cream is here!! soooo, gurmit ordered a whole cart of "hagen daze" icecream for all cast n company!!! yesh, a whole cart like u see along orchard road, but now isnt walls but "hagen daze" k... he is sosososos nice..... its not only bcoz he ordered xpensive icecream for us that made him nice k..there was that time when i was asking him to sign for indoor poster n for us, he actully say he nvr see me n asked for my name... actually asked how to spell... haha.. thou i doubt he can still remember me, not to mention my name, its already nice enuff of him... yeah... so we ate yummy ice creams n spent our time taking photos.. took wif all i wanted, the water boys, "honey" n gang, the "2 old pple" etc etc.. dunno y, jamie teo appeared outside our production room... haha n we took photos wif her of coz.. well, the whole world is full of meinus... zi bei already...

adeline isnt here n i cant go up to the orchestra there.. argh... n cant do wat i wanted to do.. hehe *winks but finally she appeared behind me when i was chantin n chanting her name.... haha.. so change of plan, to sign on posters instead of tee shirt huh... nvm still got chance. ade asked belly n fang to give out photos to the artists etc.. i was amending the claim form n she came over to me n ask: u want to give the photos to the orchestra?? haha.. of coz i want.. lolx. but he nvr order.. argh.. to think that ade can actually say: i can give u one extra photo la, then u ask him dunno who order tis extra one loh... haha... ~can i?? =P

in the end 3 of us went up n met sumei. agreed to take photo wif her harp later.. hehe n tis give me more xcuse to take wif u noe who.. haha.. up there, my rada is switched on automatically n started scanning.. to my horror, he was actually sittin there wif that girl, 2 person alone!! argh.. gek. jealous. jealous. angry!! how cld he.. how cld she!! kill me... haha.. we walked thru the audience seats to find fang, peepin n catching glimps of the 2 of them... argh.. kill me... every glimpse is like a *argh*... dunno how to say.. jealous, *uurh*....

but i dun admit defeat leh, huh!! haha.. so i had my plan no. 2: to take photo during interval... haha.. was armed wif ade's camura, haha.. shall slack on the last day, n fang shall do the subtitles.. hehe.. actually wanted to pei belly one, but i ended up watching the show, 1.5m away from stage left's staircase..super vip seat leh, haha.. hmmm its a totally dif feeling... dunno how to say.. soo, its interval... rushed up but the 2 singaporeans are missin!! spotted sumei shortly n took wif her harp.haha, v nice of her.. hope our coffee bean gathering is really possible huh.. thou i prefer starbuck's chocolate ice blended, i dun mind coffee bean's coffee, lolx. haha, n he came back!! so excited! n yesh, we took photo wif him... using his camura too leh! hehe, u noe, ******lalala**** leh!!! hehe i soo happy... hehe.. =P dont worry, i nvr forget abt the timpani n drum set uncles haha.. obviously the drum set uncle had deep impression of fang... wahahaha..

i was super hyper n showed everyone the photos, haha.. but dun think i look good leh, nvm... i may look better in his camura rit? haha!!! (fang belly dun kill me...lolx) shortly, the show ended.. tis time is really an end.. the finale was really a finale.. real words came from the bottom of their hearts, extra n interesting additions on the last day. so we sld really watch last shows in future huh... well, if i ain smsing my uncle b4 that n concentrated on watching the whole show, tears can really drop down my face man.. having been thru the "whole" production, its juz like seeing ur baby becoming successful n gettin married.. it's the same for any production, be it concerts or musical.. that kind of feeling, i dunno how to say, my eng ain good...

the show ended but it's the beginning to another chapter.. we got more things to do... stage hands were clearing the props, pico pple were practically tearing down the whole stage.. 3 of us have new tasks: to set up an autograph booth outside the reception.. but when we reached, he was there wif that girl, n one more.. *urrrh... nvm.. they came n signed, haha.. stupid me nvr say wat i wanted n always liddat, nvr do correct things but stupid things then to regret later... argh.. so everyone sign n sign n sigh...... haiz ='( ltr we went to keep music stands.. well, the head really dunno wat is to be kept n etc.. basically= blur. so now then u noe how dif it's to organize n prepare rit? i seriously think a leader sldnt be liddat.. they sld..i dunno how to explain... well, juz hope i wldnt follow such leaders in future huh... *pray

i drank n drank. dun worry, only 2 la haha.. so is drank n drank loh.. but they taste nice! some jack daniels (izzit? i dunno...), juz something, something wif sprite.. the choir conductor taught us to go to the counter n say: one peach. n i got what i was drinking.. so anyone knows to how order wat i drank? cant be saying the same thing when i go outside to pubs or clubs or whereever in future rit? haha.. nice drink. everyone givin me chance huh, hehe so pai seh.. dunno wat mimi told him.. ahhh.. n they exchanged contacts wif me standing there? kill stupid me ba...ahhhh.. but yesh, 5 of us get to talk. singaporeans united among the sea of china pple. (no, i dun mean much k..) yah, the 5 of us.. can the 5 of us go out for future coffee bean drinks?? hehe, i really hope so ah.. belly did the good deed of getting his msn contact, n sumei's email.. mei nu zui mei le!!! haha, but izzit useful? i really hope so. so i have to wait online everyday? haah.. stupid me again, lotz of chance nvr cherish. n to regret when i think abt it, regret.. kill me... n shortly, they left.. byebye.. muz see u again leh!! sobx... sobz.... so we took photos, n joked around.. soon we have to go, to stock take n shortly the bus came..... waved good bye n really good bye... when will we meet again? hmmmmm... hou hui you qi ba...

i guess thats the reason y i ain feelin totally happpy when i got back my freedom. fond memories from the musical are still flashing in my brain.. thou there are times when we are pissed off, angry, sian diao.. there are oso times filled wif fun n laughter, happiness n more fun... really yi yi bu she.. really hope to stay in contact wif those (not all of coz) mian mian zhi jiao, to know them better as they seem to be nice pple. n to stay in deeper contact wif those i am better wif, can we? shall wait for the circulation of the "contact list".. shall keep my fingers crossed...

but 1 thing, i nvr regret volunteering yeah...

so i told my dad that i drank as we stepped into our hse together, after our work, at 1 plus in the morning.. guess wat, he said: yah, ur face is slightly red haha!! wat a reply, amazingly.. haha

eh... one thing to clarify.. i think i really fa1 hua1 chi1 during this period. but really for fun one k!!first is casey, then don. n now, u noe who.. haha!! sorri belly, sorri yingfang.. they have to bear wif me n my crazyness.. haha.. but some sort addicted liao leh, will try to control n get back to normal ya... play till shang ying le.. but u noe, its hard to decelerate when u are at the peak, when u are most high leh... so bear wif me for a while more lah hor everyone.. hmm.. will continue to try to be back to my normal self.. haha.. thou i ain confident abt the last rnd.. we shall see yah.. hehe (",) *wiNks

well...

2005-06-08T00:06:00.000+08:00

hmmm, today can be considered a happy day... lotz of things happened.. haha, like shopping in the morning ever since dunno when... only can today be considered a true shopping trip, not tat sick day at ps lolx.. so one needs to be healthy to shop huh? haha.. yeah, i am much better already.. but being unemployed means no income.. n when u are out at a place wif full of temptations, u will juz end up dry at the end of the day.. haiz, so me left wif no cash in my wallet.. okay, self consolation: i never bring out much cash in the first place yah? haha =P

haha, got money from the atm machine at caldecott (how to pronounce anyone???) hill.. my only chance left to use that machine located there huh.. *LaMe* okay.. nvm i get to eat the kuai le yu finally.. haha, full of excitment n well, it's indeed not bad... only regret is not to take a photo of it b4 eating.. haha, n i actually discussed abt this fish wif bf thru the phone.. wat a pity she isnt at work today argh.. star of the day: leejingmei.. wah, pretty pretty pretty... quanyifeng oso not bad.. shockingly shocked by her.. ha zhuhouren n that tall tall msia girl from the champions again.. well, had lunch wif marcus.. obviously he dun recognize the 3 of us from far, n neither does he recognize the 2 of us from near.. hmm, his gf is indeed very pretty.. n indeed there is a story behind everyone...hmmm.. anw, will his gf know my jielun one day...???? edison filmed initial d wif jielun ma, so quite connected ya hehe but i realised i tend to subconciously ding zui, anyone n everyone.. tis is bad huh.. tsk tsk.. hope i nvr offend anyone.. muz be careful.. argh.. so bad.... but i really dun mean it... i am so harmless rit hahaha!! but i really dun mean it..

photo taking day at the studio.. managed to take a photo wif my casey lolx!!! haha ok, not mine la... will treasure that photo thou.. rare chance.. so now i have lotz of photos in my sis's bf's $800++ digicam... stressed.. how i wished to have one under my name, so i need not be so stress n restrained.. but no money, no talk.. haiz... so have to "live under someone else's name".. argh.. ya photos, but today's juz those snap shots.. for a documendation? or dunno wat... dunno how to spell.. shall try my bez to take wif the cast... but its still beri paiseh... haiz... it's always better to be younger.. every thing oso can.. ask for signature or photos oso no need paiseh or wat... haiz.. dun want to get old... in a few more mths' time i can no longer sing that song, 18 yr old girl is liek a flower already.... tis is bad... so i better stop suaning bel n yf being old... =Z to really think of it, its scary.. so i shall stop scaring myself.. but true enuff, we have only one chance to be young, so cherish it n be daring enuff to really try those we can only try when we are young...

does it apply to asking for photo taking wif pierre?? lolx nah... haha

well finally me n fang know wat we are in charge of after so many days of helping out here n there, aka da za... this allows us to have a highest priority access pass which states "all access". haha.. coz we da za so we are going everywhere n hence we muz n can have such a da pai access card... lolx.. but we are in charge of the subtitles.. so we will sit there, to click n click the powerpoint slides as they act.. that's y we are preparing the pp slides at home yest n are exempted from the full dress rehearsal.. thereby spoiling my plan.. =( but i muz admit, the translation is a bit cmi.. haha so here comes my n yf to the rescue.. haha hope it will go quite smoothly..

so we went off damn early to our next stop: njc
1st to see upon arrival: sharon phua... haha obviously she dunno we are collectin cert AT THE LIBRARY n not office!!!! still suan us that office closed already n we can try our luck *bleah* library staff are nice pple.. *secret transation* haha.. well today's qing gong yen is not a qing gong yen... i feel that its juz like a normal buffet for us to talk n eat only loh.. no sense of happiness or wat.. but nvm i get to eat nice food n see "old pple".. so seniors have special rights, like cuttin queue etc haha.. but everything too fast i think.. blink blink n its over, we go home already.. nah.. but its very funny at the elections, we are having a good time ourself.. so sorri juniors =P its nice seeing them lah.. but next yr go back no familar faces already, nono..

time flies actually.. if i only could pause it when i want to...

re-hihihi =P

2005-06-06T00:24:00.000+08:00

uoo, its been soooo long since i blogged huh... looking back, i was sooooo busy.. shall reblog n make up as much as i could, haha.. so u guys have to start from the bottom to know wat i am talking abt huh, lolx

TODAY...
hmmm, today went to mediacorp in the morning as usual.. not as weak as yest le, but wif a more "obvious" flu.. sunday morning n i am the LAST to leave home at 8am haha went there to move the instruments to tv theater 4 again.. then we went to eat branch?? haha, i had a burger... the western food uncle very friendly, n upon seeing the "xi ling men" poster, i asked if the kuai le yu was cooked by him n he said it indeed was. a plate for $4.50 haha, wld be more x outside.. i die die oso muz try b4 tuesday, my last day at mediacorp.. sobz, i wldnt have chance to see my jielun there already... he better go the musical man haha =P adeline told us that each of us wld have 4 tickets, each worth $85.. the most x is $100, wahahaha.. jEaLoUs?? haha... $85 x 4 = $340 = my pay ba... haha then adrian pang came wif his "tou ke duan, tou fa bu neng luan" hairstyle... he was looking at us like we are looking at him.. muz be thinking who on earth are we to be at the canteen on a sunday morning.. so we checked out the snooker room wif 4 pool tables.. itchy itchy hand man... shall pray that marcus have the stuff security pass to access to the room haha =P hmmm then ade said that gurmit is sick, hope he gets well beri soon if not i dunno wat will happen... so we slept at the room for liek half n hour.. its soooo comfortable... if only i din wear contacts n tie my hair, i wld definitely sleep longer.. freezing cold, we went out to audience seat.. n shortly, they had lunch.. go go go, then we could go off too... on our way out, edmund asked: "u dun want to help the rhythm section?" haha i replied: "dun want la, later i screw everything up, haha" n i walked away... well, did i give a wrong reply?? hmm, thou i dun like him but haha maybe tis wld be a better reply: "they really need help ah?? haha" maybe he will really allocate something for me as i think they really need help.. damn nan2 de2 chance.. can say i performed at pck musical, haha... even thou its juz playing the egg shaker rit?? well... we shall see then... but wif my that kind of reply.. i guess its xiong duo ji shao already, unless they really need pple.. haha.. dun be so stupid to give stupid replies again, understand mingyong? haha so hanged around a while, met those supporting cast.. belinda boo, haha u are good man.. hmm so we went off shortly n took bus back.. by right sld drop off halfway, but i din... too tired while sleepin on the bus till i almost dropped off the seat i realised.. so i went home n bathed.. cooked a packet of instant noodles at 3 plus n slept till dinner time n eat again.. will i get fat at this rate? haha.. hopefully... =P anw, muz thank someone for the msg early in the morning, really morning huh.. lolx

SAT, 4th June 2005...
well, dragged myself to mediacorp today.. i officially going to be sick already, those sore throat, those ucles, those feeling that everything will convert to flu then fever eventually.. think i really lack of rest, too busy already.. till i become sick huh.. sooo cold.. then everyday drink mineral water, not home cooked water, haiz.. but i cant possibly bring a 1.5 liter bottle rit, haha.. fang not goin so only me n belly.. the girls not here too.. but luckily the guys got come.. so we moved everything from theater 4 to another place, which is like theater 4 too?? i dunno lah, the whole place is so confusing.. so deep down till got b4 level etc.. haha.. y muz move here n there? coz tonit got pu wei zhi ye, live, so they need the theater we are currently using.. well wif those moving, poor timpani's wheels came off n we have to fix it back.. poor instruments... so after moving, we went for mac breakfast.. haha, poor "honey" aka han ling i think, i dunno.. he was suanned by me.. i sung cyndi's honey in front of him haha.. but we really seldom communicate wif the guys, i really dunno wat's their name n where they are from. they oso dun bother to interact wif us, y lidat one.. are pple outside really so wat till they dun bother to know their working pals whom they will be seeing everyday? isnt it weird.. hmmm.. i still think its weird.. i sld take the initiative meh? nono haha see how ba.. but now, how to squeeze?? 4 guys, 3 girls.. in a damn posh car... at first have to sit on belly's leg... well it's always me.. so pai seh, dunno got block the driver's view or not haha.. then end up they managed to give me a space.. but adeline decided to squart on the "floor" of the car.. that shows how small she is rit.. haha.. really squashed.. the 2 guys are acting gay in the car, what happened to the guys on earth now? all like to act gay, haha juz like those few from s13 huh, damn pro too lolx. after breakfast, they had to go ps buy things for costumes.. on the way to the car, one of them took out a cigerette, so i thot he is smokin but i am only half correct.. 3 of them took turns to smoke the same cigerette.. eeee, disgusting... smoke smoke la, cause envt pollution already still so disgusting.. y muz 3 share 1.. eeee.. maybe that way can smoke less juz to shuang a bit izzit? i dunno.. haiz, so everyone outside smokes.. think they are uni students only loh, haiz.. so i realised only "honey" dun smoke, the political science nus undergrad thou he dun look a bit like one haha.. so we ended up at ps.. went yamaha to buy the key for the drum set.. well, nothing for us to do back at mediacorp too, so we can actually go off.. but we haven exchange our security pass!!!! argh.. how how.. i dun want to go back there..

in the end belly went back in a cab, may nu, u most beautiful already, haha =P coz i thot i wld be going to bbq at nit, so sldnt head to mediacorp then go home then go bbq..i wld most prob sleep at home till miss bbq. told wj n we are watching movie b4 bbq.. but i am too early for our movie at 2.30pm.. walkin around the whole ps, its not shopping, there is no element of happy nor excitment of being able to buy things, think bcoz i was sick.. wanted to sit down but dunno go where.. so cont to walk abt.. went to contempo pop sch to take brochure haha, i am going to learn man, after the production... but as i walk n walk, i really feel more n more like dying liao.. n stupid wj say he will ying xiong jiu mei.. haha.. thanks huh, 1stly he not ying xiong, is hou zi.. 2ndly, i not mei nu,haha.. he sld brush up his idoms man, lolx.. for once, time in a shopping centre is so hard to pass.. finally they came n here we come madagascar, lolx.. well, wx is late as usual.. funny n cute show.. cute animals, i like haha n that dance.. *dance* haha anyone knows the lyrics to the song? blocked ears cant hear clearly lolx. blur me almost almost stepped into the guys toilets after the movie, see how terrible i am.. hungry, so i had my lunch at 4 plus, thinking that i sure cant eat anything at bbq at my tis kind of state so muz fill up my stomach.. but i really cant take it already, feel so tired n weak.. guess i will juz sleep at the bed in the chalet if i go for the bbq, so i decided to go home instead.. feel so sorry hl, cant pei u thou i promised i will go.. sorry hwee, so last min cant go.. n so so so sorry sl, i not da pai k, but i really unwell lah.. but muz thank him for his invitation, sooo honoured siah haha.. so its so bad to fall sick at the wrong time.. ='( so they went to heeren, n i went home.. haha, thou they claimed that they will find a vet immediately to cure me, but its nice enuff of monkey daddy to ask me msg him when i reach home haha.. he scared his mousey daughter faint on the way home huh.. lolx but i appreciate it a lot.. =P well, i dun ask for much, juz a seat on the way home.. but i dun manage to get one.. argh.. i was practically sleeping while standing, wif my head on the handle at the side near the door.. think i threw all my face already but i dun care already.. sooo weak.. i slept on the bus till i almost almost overshot.. piew~ slept all the way till dinner time n cont sleeping after the flu tablet.. zzZzzzZzzZzzz...

FRIDAY, 3rd JUNE 2005
woh, woke up damn early today.. got ready n went to mnd complex for the stupid interview at bca.. building n construction authority of spore.. haha, first time going for int, but its also first time so hack care attitude.. did went to have a bit of research on its website but i generally dunno wat it does. not to say materials engin, so in short, i went to the int unprepared.. had never been so unprepared b4.. 1st to reach but 2nd on the list. seems to have only 3 pple.. 3 of us sat there, no talk, so weird.. n nobody bother to take the initiative to start talking leh.. so uncomfortable, how i wish the int cld start immediately.. so finally one went in. for once, i start to feel a bit scared, n thought of possible things they cld ask. i am scared already. but when i went in, its still okay, not that scared.. but they started bombarding me wif qns on materials engin, those 3 uncles dun seem to have heard abt materials engin huh? haha.. i oso not sure, so ended up crappin n making up things haha.. then they asked me wat do i noe abt bca, dead. then they asked me y i applied for bca schship, dead. my ans haha: "actually i applied for qte a few, but i nvr apply those beri prestigious ones liek psc.." DEAD, ahha, n they were liek u mean bca not prestigious? lolx, i really dunno y i said that.. wen bu dui ti, not thinking straight already.. then one uncle asked: "i realised that ur results r generally qte gd except ur eng, c6..wat u want to do abt it?" i said maybe brush up in uni, got courses.. read more, said i read newspaper. then he said, in bca, u will need to write a lot of reports in eng u noe.. then the other uncle asked if i read novels, n i said no.. then he said, the only way to improve is to read more novels, haha, n my reply, if i were to read novels, i wld read chinese novels, haha.. not comics, but novels.. haha then one asked if i play games, i was like, computer games?? n they bursted in laughter.. argh.. i was malu-ed.. so paiseh, n said: "u mean sports n games??" haha... die already, n everything over.. thank you.. i walked out.. so malu till i told the 3rd guy that i think i screwed up the int... he was askin y n if they are very friendly.. told him abt the games thing n he had the same reaction, computer games?!? haha.. guess wat, he said smt like wonder uall are laughing so loudly.. he meant he can hear us laugh from outside!?!? omg.. malu-ed.. one young girl go interview n made 3 old uncles laugh so loudly huh, lolx.. argh.. well, nvm.. its over.. 99% they wldnt give it to me, even b4 the stupid interview haha.. coz i am in materials engin.. watever.. never had high hopes anyway.. haha, belly said i went there to ti guan, meaning like those in tv shows, i going to the company to mess up them. haha.. really arh..?? =P

juz nice, got cora's msg that the gv vouchers are ready for collection. since today is the only day i am free, i might as well go.. cant possibly go after changing at home as me n bell talkin cab from je, so i went straight.. went to atm to get $700 cash.. scary.. n i am broke.. ='( haha, but it feels so nice to be back there.. the pple, thou left only a few familar faces but the warmth is still around.. think some dun really remember me that well, like angelica, forgot my name, but actually remembered xiao bai...argh...haha!! but really happy going back even for a short while.. muz thank those idiotic guys for being in a meeting so that i can go talk wif those old collegues for a while, haha.. hmmm, never regretted working there, so muz thank fgf afterall huh.. ahha, shant blame u for ur recommendation to the 2 bad uncles, friendship had overcome the "nightmare"? lolx but since i had to rush down to mediacorp, i cant stay for lunch wif them..

took cab wif belly to mediacorp, so excited. haha, when i alight, the taxi uncle actually asked if we are actresses, lolx!! do we look like we are? thanks huh uncle. haha.. we found our way there n hmm quite posh n cooold!!! haha.. well toilet is definitely much better than those at kallang.. =P since they are so bored, we went to the canteen n had some snacks.. saw le yao.. well she is qte plain looking without makeup.. haha.. n we went back.. watched them practice n its dinner time soon.. b4 that i finally managed to pass the letter to mr casey, yes, mr peter casey, the famous composer for musicals n producers for firms n etc..? i dunno the details but he is very famous, try typin his name at yahoo n u will get some results.. haha.. he is sooooo charming, soooo zai.. sooooo nice... so famous yet humble, u can really feel his warmth personality.. very willing to work for him, listen to him etc etc.. aohhhh, he is so nice.. haha.. tink i am in love wif him le, lolx!! but jielun is still "my favourite husband, thou he is my only husband" at the moment, lolx.. (quoted from pck) haha.. looking forward to seeing more stars, we took the packed rice to the canteen again.. tis time, we got more treats.. we saw liuqianyi, yaowenlong, xiumeizhen, n the guy news broadcaster. he is wearing the same shirt as he was on tv, reportin those outside news. watching himself on tv? lolx. meizhen is very beautiful, but y isnt she that hong? i dunno.. n when we were leavin, that long hair lady who was backfacing our table, sitting wif the table of stars was actually the tall girl from the champians.. i dunno her name.. oso very beautiful.. haha, maybe we sld brush up our tou kan ming xin's skills huh, haha.. we cont to watch them practice after dinner.. n its time to go.. moved the instru to a side n we can leave already.. fazli is so nice to give us a ride out but we have to squeeze in the posh car... edmund ooi's car.. u noe who is edmund ooi?? eh, dunno how to explain.. so i sat on yf's leg, y me.. haha.. n we alighted at busstop n home sweet home.. another tiring day...

passing thoughts only...

2005-05-21T13:23:00.000+08:00

well, juz read a few blogs, a few which i had never seen b4... went to look at pics, lotz of them... thoughts flooded my mind... more of the section, i really meant section, that section which is dominated by girls @ the moment... have been holding back.. haven been myself i realised... y is there such a restrain? y cant "we" be in the so-called MS but to be sort of "FP"??? according to the MS, "we" are the FP, attitude, problem makers, non peace lovers...thou they supports "our" actions sometimes... according to "us", the MS is acting, pretending to be helpful generally... think the whole world knows those 2 gps dun like each other, but have been acting friendly... dun seem to have freedom...there seems to be a force from above... dun seem to stand straight... but cant blame anything, its juz like someone born in that family.. he dun have the choice to choose, thou he has many complains.. but he is well provided for in that family, so he sld be grateful... smt liddat... so he is automatically associated to the family n be part of the "we"... but i know he dun regret thou... many fond memories n friendship n bonds formed... yet the MS dun seem to give chance... juz like that day, haven i longed to go? i wld like to go help, support, do the minor bit i think i can.. but i dunno if i can... nobody replies... iznt it bcoz they dun care? well, i m juz insignificant in the MS... haha

but sometimes, things have to depend on tian shi di li ren he too... shant elaborate...

or maybe its bcoz of my indecisiveness, so i am easily..."Manipulated"... smt more mild than manipulate actually, only lady Macbeth is manipulative..haha!!! bully isnt the word too, i ain being bullied...

anw, understood wat is really meant by world peace... long for peace only.. but when will it be fulfilled...?

foresee some more stuff to settle in the near future... cant wash hands off them totally, but i dunno how to go abt solving it... juz hope that 3rd ww wldnt erupt tis time... =X

well, passing thoughts only... i believe i will juz let it be... no point trying to amend deliberately... smt like "qin ze zi qin", cant think of a more appropriate cheng yu... they know, they will know... they dunno, its their loss, hahahaha!!!! but i know that someone born in that family is actually happy... haha =)

so meanwhile, i will try hard to be an effective loan shark... i got 3 days... lets see wat excuses QWB can fake tis 3 days.....

Yesterday...

2005-05-20T14:01:00.000+08:00

hmmm, i had a busy day yest man... 100% housewife... lets see:
no. of items hand-washed: 4 tops, 2 hamtaros (25cm tall each), 1 pig (20cm tall), 1 skinny monkey (15cm tall), a hp pouch, a sling bag...
no. of items machine-washed: 2 dogs (one skinny, one bigger), 1 tortoise
swept n mopped the whole house
cleared 2 of the small shelves in my 2 rooms
washed n changed water for Yoyo

anw, those animals are my softtoys lah... have to clear more space for the gigantic closet which has a long story behind its arrival in 2 weeks' time... so was occupied the whole day until 7.15... housewife day... pang seh wx's pool session to be a housewife.. =P but yoyo was happy lah... good boy man... he knows who is good to him lah.. hehe.. n yah, while changing water, i saw 2 oriental white eye(birds) on the shi liu(plant) outside my house!! they are chirping non-stop n you can see them obviously playing wif each other...1st thought: to open the door, let them fly in, n maybe i can have 2 more pets, haa.. 2nd thought: take photo!! so i washed my hand, rushed to take the digicam, n while waitin for it to switch on, they flew away, together happily... haiz, missed the nice scene man....

the day haven end k... more "excitment"... the stupid alarm rang.. the ADT alarm... sooo loud n nobody knows the pin number to stop it... the stupid person called to look for mr teo or mr tay, i told him they are not arnd.. n he refused to like tell me more, wanna ask him smt n he keeps on saying: "you are not one of the key-holders so we cant disclose anything to u...blah blah blah..." fine... mr teo knows less than me lah.. haiz... this isnt the first time liao... stupid alarm... anyhow ring.....

pissed... wif both man in the story... both of us are pissed lah.. i know we are bad... but we cant help it...sometimes, i really wonder y he is liddat man... pei fu the only woman among us who can remain calm n cool towards this.............. hackcareattitude of his..... but we juz cant do anything... argh...

wat a day at home...

to my diary...

2005-05-20T13:08:00.000+08:00

dear diary...
having a blog doesn't mean i dun need u...
i am juz attracted by the wonderful effect of those htmls n pictures available...
i will still feed u consistently wif my inner thoughts...
feed you with the things not meant for YOU to see, haha...
yesh, the YOU refers to YOU pple reading my blog...

haha, so if anyone gets to read my diary huh, i can juz KILL the person man.. haha evil huh.. =P hmm, but dunno how long i gets to maintain this blog man... this is actually my 2nd blog loh.. the first one is pronounced dead liao... if uall want to zhan yang my previous blog's yi rong, go http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=hAm_RoNg. you can know how bad it is.. haha... i gave up on xanga's html already n here i come blogger... haha, so its successful i guess.. so happy... my forever friends setting.. hehe

so HaPpY BiRtHdAy my blog.. n HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMMY!!!

*Heaven*

happy new yr

wx competiton n pageant

stupid, hamsters

busy

my dearest...

sat 17th

busy week

hehe so happy...

sianz

To: yoyo n xiao bai

put aeroplane

i'll be wif u

sianz

energy concert

pics of pck

my family...

wat a day....

JIE LUN!!!

crazy...

the last memorable day.....

well...

re-hihihi =P

passing thoughts only...

Yesterday...

to my diary...

Heaven